15 Answers

Should we have more children? I’d love your advice please.

I currently have 3 children, a 1 year old, 3 year old and 4 year old and we are contemplating having one more.

Was it a big change going from 3 to 4? What was the bedroom situations and car situation like?


Posted by mumof3, 14th July 2021

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  • Such a hard decision to make! I only have two and we’re done {although I would have had more, in a heartbeat!}. I just wanted to pop in and say that I’m one of 4 and I LOVED growing up with lots os siblings.

  • You are financially stable so why not, I hope to have atleast for 4 myself. I’m currently pregnant with #3. If you are still feeling a bit unsure give yourself time as your youngest is still little. You might feel very ready for baby 4 in a year or so, and if not you have 3 beautiful children already to adore.

  • It is up to you. You will definitely need more bigger car and more bedrooms. Also be sure there is someone to help you as all of kids under 5.

  • If you both want another child and are financially able to do so, I would go for it. Yes you will need a bigger car (although many with 3 kids have 7 or 8 seaters these days anyway, so this may not be a concern for you) and your children may grow up having to share a bedroom with a sibling – but these aren’t huge issues in the scheme of things if this is something you both want.

    I would personally love a 4th child, but my husband doesn’t, because of the financial reasons mostly. We only have 5 seater cars and live in a 3 bedroom unit (our daughters share a room and our son has his own room).

    Good luck ❤️

  • My dear friend just had her 9th child, boy number 8! She homeschools them all too, she said that the more you have and closer in age means they grow up and play together and older ones always help out they work as a unit to get anything done she’s super mum.

  • You already have my respect having 3- 2 was enough for me! And I have a 2.5yr gap between.

  • Apparently research shows that parents of 3 are the least happy of any number of kids! Just an interesting statistic and not one to make a decision off, statistics are nothing when it comes to the individual. Hope you make a decision that makes you happy

  • Firstly, it is absolutely your choice , no one elses!
    It does mean a big jump up re stuff such as bigger cars, and bigger homes. I guess the age of the kids you have already may sway you…if some are older and more independent you may feel that now is a good time, ‘easier’ than say when you have everyone under 5 and they are all more needy of you.
    I also think if you really want it , you find a way, but you have to think very hard about things like the practicalities of the less time available for each existing child, and yourself if you add another.
    Think it over not just when you are tired after a hard day, but after a great day, to get a realistic idea. If you are secure and content and want to do it, do it!

  • I know lots of people with 4 children and although each new addition brings challenges, there is also much joy. 4 rather than 3 does tend to make you really consider house size, car size etc and then if you need to upgrade.

  • I have four children. I found that the fourth child meant that we needed a bigger car and a bigger house! FInancially it can have an effect as well. But, it’s absolutely worth it in every way.

  • When you desire a 4th child, then go for it. It will work out. We have 4 kids from which 2 have special needs, which make it very busy. But when I would have only the 2 with special needs, it would be even more busy as my typical children bring balance and are helpful.
    Yes it will effect your living situation, but that’s ok. We live in a 5 bedroom house and feel we need that. I drive a 7seater, which gets us around fine. Oversees traveling is and going in quarantine with the 6 of us is very expensive

  • I had four children and it wasn’t planned and it made a big difference with the car as wasn’t big enough so another car had to be bought and also bedrooms, so it does make a difference in a lot of areas that is going to cost you money you may or may not have.

  • I have four kids, though only three living. I would say that if you want that fourth one emotionally, go for it. You’ll work the practicalities out.

  • We had three and were talking about having a fourth in a year or two, however despite the morning after pill we ended up expecting a month after deciding. Our house was two small to accomodate a fourth child, but we wanted to move anyway so that was fine.
    For us other than having to move was the car situation as we are car enthusiasts and driving a mum bus didn’t appeal to me. My daughter is 11 now and I have to say the options for larger family cars are a lot nicer. We made it work for us by getting a commodore wagon and adding two seats, and my husband put an extra row of seats in his work van.
    Moving unto the future, finding cheap holiday accomodation wasn’t easy but we took portable options, or paid extra for roll outs. And having said that, even with a family of five it’s challenging or very expensive once you look into cruising and overseas trips etc.

    I would’t change anything for the world. My daughter was meant to be with us. Trust your instincts. If it’s meant to be it will all fall into place and work out

  • To add we are financially stable so money isn’t an issue.

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