Bullying and Suicide are becoming too common

9 Comments

I live in a small country town in Tasmania, only a couple of thousand people live here, and we are about 32 kms away from another small town that we have both had something in common.

BULLYING WHICH CAUSED 2 SUICIDES – 1 was a 15 year old girl, how awful for her family, and how awful for that beautiful young lady who had her life ahead of her, she felt like she had to commit suicide, and hung herself in a park in this small town near us. She was left there hanging for 5 hours, school buses full of school kids of all ages went past her not long after she was found, all to be seen, those poor kids, how do you explain in to them.
And…. the cause was bullying. Bullying on Facebook and bullying in the school yard. Now, we can’t blame Facebook, I am an admin of 2 groups, a creater of 1 group on Chronic Pain, so you can’t blame Facebook. Without facebook, I know of 4 other people who would of committed suicide.

I blame the schools. They say they have a policy on bullying but I know for a fact that kids who bully others in the schools get away with it. My 5 yr old granddaughter became a victim of bullying in Prep in the second week of school. So, what do we do? We all need to take it more seriously, including the parents of these “good” kids who are terrible bullies. I have heard it over and over again “My child is not a bully, she//he couldn’t be, she/he has so many friends.” There are many teachers here that ignore kids when they tell them they are being bullied. “OH just go and play”, they have been told. Then,

The second suicide was a friend of mine. A friend for 12 years. She was in her late 50’s, being bullied again on Facebook by another woman in her 50’s. She should have known better. How dare a grown woman bully another, that is absolutely disgraceful, aren’t we adult enough to talk as adults, sort out the problems instead of airing out private matters in public. My friend went outside, supposedly to go to the toilet, her hubby sat in the lounge room. Next thing he saw a police car pull up, so he walked out the back door to greet this policewoman, to find his wife, my friend, hanging in the carport. He screamed out for help, saying she is still alive, help me help me, so the policewoman, went out of procedure and got her down, but it was definitely far too late. She had been dead for awhile. He was so sure she hadn’t gone long, but as soon as she walked outside, she got the string that binds bails of hay, climbed up on the back of the ute, put the string in place and jumped. Instantly gone.

To me, suicide due to bullying should be regarded as a kind of manslaughter. She would not have hung herself if she wasn’t bullied. She had only days before rung me for help to take this woman to court that was giving her trouble. A nasty piece of work. But, no, her husband of over 36 years will always remember seeing how she died.

We all need to unite, stop bullying, or all talk about it between eachother, with friends, teachers, principals, family, neighbours, everyone. We need to stop bullying, it really isn’t fair, and not right. We were not bought into this life to be nasty to others.

There would be many more real life stories like this everywhere, but this is the 3rd suicide in the 14 years we have been here. It is so very sad.

Please do me a favour, if you read this, talk to someone about how we can stop bullying, then post a message who you spoke to, not a name, a title, whether it was the local police, neighbour, principal, teacher, mother, father, etc etc. If we spread what has happened in this town, and how awful and sad this is, then hopefully we can do our bit. If you know someone who is a bully, please sit them down and tell them about this young lady and my friend, and how bullying can cause suicide, because if I have my way, bullying that leads to suicide WILL become manslaughter.

Thank you and lets all be happy
xxx Dee

Posted by dee lindsay, 28th March 2015

9 Comments

- - buggeritliz said
  - 18 Apr 2015
    6:09 pm
Thank you for writing such a great article so close to home. We must talk to our family and friends and let them know if they are feeling threatened and being bullied let others know who is doing this to them. It’s a disgraceful act to be responsible for someone who took their life because you said something that pushed them over the edge. If you feel fragile at least tell your doctor or partner and of course call LIFELINE 131114 and Blackdog Institute Randwick NSW 9382 4530 or Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636.

- - dee lindsay said
  - 18 Apr 2015
    4:18 pm
I totally agree with the both of you. We do need to teach our kids that “Sticks and sones may break my bones, but words can never hurt” so to speak. I have found that if we respond in any way to the bully eg. cry, run away, punch back, whatever, the bully enjoys it. We need to teach our kids to not react at the time, Just, laugh, turn away laughing then go in privately for a cry. The bully will soon go and find someone else.

It is sad these days how bad it is. The day I was called ‘Maggot’, I ran after the boy, in primary school, and chased him around a ute. I still remember his name “Wayne Tippett”. I cut my leg on the rusty exhaust pipe and had to go to the teacher. My dad came and picked me up to take me to hospital as it needed stitches, and Wayne was given the strap.

I still believe in Corporal punishment, it stopped wayne bullying me, for someone else to take over as I was also overweight. I think the only way for these kids to learn is to get the strap. Bullying was bad back 40 to 50 years ago, but not as bad as today with the internet, mobile phones and social media.

I love all of my grandchildren so very much and it pains me to hear that a little prep girl at the age of 5, who is a sweet little girl, has money stolen, and goes without lunch, because her friend doesn’t have anything. The friend, well so called friend, only takes one bit out of everything and gives it back or throws it on the ground. I always though children in the first couple of grades of school had to sit down and eat together with the teacher, then when they have ALL finished, THEN they are allowed to go and play. HA, yeah right, the laziness of some of the teachers is disgusting.

I hope your daughter goes through school without seeing any bullying Kelly, I wish you both all the luck in the world. xx LET’S GET RID OF BULLYING!

- - kellstar said
  - 17 Apr 2015
    10:47 am
Agree, teachers have a lot to do with bullying & schools need to take more responsibility for bullies. My younger brother who had struggled with learning throughout school was punched by a girl in his class. I spoke to the girl & told her if she touched him again then she would be in a lot of trouble. I then had a the deputy principle call me into a office alone and say to me that I was nothing but a thug!! I could not believe I was being called names for sticking up to a bully. I did not threaten to touch the girl just simply said that she would be in a lot of trouble as in we would go to the principle. Know that I\’m older I question if they would of even done anything about it.
This experience will be with me for the rest of my life & I\’m dreading the day my daughter has to experience school yard bullying. From as early as grade 2 I can remember being bullied for something, eg. my name rhymes with smelly, I was over weight
I hope my daughter will feel comfortable telling me her issues at school as I always felt my mum didn\’t really care I was bullied daily. We were in a small town so there was no other school for us to go to. We just had to deal with it.

- - mrsgreen12 said
  - 07 Apr 2015
    7:04 pm
It is a sad world we live in today. Watching Dr Phil and how many suicides are happening is outrageous and very very sad!
I dont think the bullying will ever stop as its been happening for ever, it is just easier over the internet these days and with saying that we need to teach our kids to be strong enough to ignore and deflect this behaviour. The more we cotton ball our kids the more sensitive and prone to bullying they will be, Im not saying its the victims fault at all but i am saying that alot of kids these days cannot handle criticism or failure and we need to teach our kids to brush it off. I also think we need to teach our kids that words do hurt and to be caring and positive and never put someone else down. teach our kids empathy, consideration and kindness. I think that there needs to be a department that is focused on cyber bullying, that finds these people and stops this behaviour. its terrible that kids and adults think so low of themselves after these monsters say such horrible things. Everyone needs to feel safe on the computer, they shouldnt be afraid to go onto the computer.

- - dee lindsay said
  - 30 Mar 2015
    7:05 pm
Bullying is getting worse. I agree with both of you, and thank you for your kind words in regards to my dear friend who committed suicide. I just couldn’t imagine hanging myself, they must have been so desperate.

The schools have a lot to answer to, not the teachers as they are only bound by the rules given to them. There are some teachers that ignore the problem, and I know that bullying in schools is constant. You could turn around in circles and there would be kids everywhere being bullied, but I, like you were also bullied, as was my son. He would always get caught if he retaliated and get punished and the bully would get away with it. So, we had to teach him not to retaliate. One day in the classroom whilst the class was going, a bully broke all my son’s pencils in half, the ones with his name on them. The teacher did nothing.

I wish all parents could get together at the schools and design the bullying policy on behalf of the school as the one now doesn’t work.

xxx LETS SAY NO TO BULLYING xxx
- ashblonde replied
  
  31 Mar 2015 , 10:35 am
  I agree whole heartily with you! It has to be the school & parents working together. The eldest of our grandkids started school this year & as the grandparents are noticeable at pick up time we could become involved to help out with a No Bullying policy.
  - dee lindsay replied
    
    31 Mar 2015 , 5:44 pm
    
    I totally agree. As grandparents, we can also have a say. Especially when our grandchildren are being picked up by us, and seeing it happen.
    
    The same girl that was bullying my 5 yr old granddaughter walked up to her and her sister on Monday and offered them each a small easter egg or a small chick, they both were really happy and said thank you. The youngest granddaughter was 3. She was given the chicken. The girl then snatched the chicken off chloe (3 yrs old) and ran off laughing. Such a nasty little girl. xx dee
- - BellaB said
  - 30 Mar 2015
    12:53 pm
The trouble is that very few bullies care enough about other people to care about how their behaviour impacts people.

- - ashblonde said
  - 29 Mar 2015
    11:49 am
I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend & the young girl in your town. Having been bullied myself as a school girl I still remember the fear of having to go to school. I was humiliated in front of my supposed friends because they didn’t want to risk been bullied themselves. They didn’t attempt to stick up for me until the day a teacher caught the offenders during an attack on me & fortunately they were expelled. My life returned to normal but I never felt comfortable until my final years in high school. Thankfully it was the school staff that protected me & punished the offenders so that should happen in every school to stop this problem as early as possible. I dread what may have happened to me if it had of continued.