THANK YOU TO MY MOTHER FOR LOVING ME ENOUGH TO LET ME GO

12 Comments

I was born in the late 1950’s, at a time when there was much condemnation, and little support, for unmarried mothers. My birth-mother found herself pregnant by a man who turned out to be married. She desperately wanted to keep me, but was faced with no way to support me, and a society that was extremely judgemental and unforgiving. Although it broke her heart, she gave me up for adoption by her parents. It was done because she loved me, and wanted the best for me, and I’ve known since I was 11 that she was in fact my “mother”, as well as legally being my “sister”. We’ve always had a very close relationship, and have often talked about the circumstances surrounding my birth. The hardest thing about it for her was, when I was a small child, hearing me call someone else “Mummy”. I may be biased but I think that she has the most beautiful heart and soul of anyone I know. She turns eighty this year, has crippling arthritis, and struggles to make ends meet on an old-age pension, with little money for anything other than the bare essentials. She hasn’t had an easy life, with an abusive husband who made her life hell, but she still puts everyone else’s needs above her own. I want to acknowledge her for loving me enough to let me go, for putting what was best for me above what she wanted for herself. My mother, my hero, my friend. If I can be half the person she is, then I will indeed be a good person.

Posted by no1ladydj, 10th May 2014

12 Comments

- - mom81879 said
  - 20 Sep 2015
    6:50 pm
Awesome! So lucky you get to know each other. My mum was also a single mum in the 50s, to make things harder, the father was a coloured man. Mum kept my brother, until she met my father, who was racist and refused to accept him

- - mom56312 said
  - 25 Aug 2015
    11:14 am
This is a beautiful story, you belong to a fantastic loving family. It would of been so hard for her to let you go but so good to be able to see you grow up.

- - mom113055 said
  - 16 Apr 2015
    7:55 pm
nice story

- - mom93821 said
  - 31 Jan 2015
    10:55 pm
A beautiful and heartfelt tribute to your mum.

- - mom57522 said
  - 23 Sep 2014
    9:45 pm
Your mother sounds truly wonderful.

- - no1ladydj said
  - 18 May 2014
    2:48 pm
I thought for many years that adoptions within a family were pretty rare, but I’ve since found out that isn’t so. In years gone by, it happened a lot more than many people realized, especially because there was so little support for unmarried mothers. I count every day as a blessing, because it wasn’t easy for my mother.

- - mums-info said
  - 11 May 2014
    1:55 pm
wow im glade you got to no her for whom she is and what a sacrifice she made for you and good on her parents for helping

- - christial said
  - 10 May 2014
    10:02 pm
What an inspiring story. You are very lucky that you got to grow up in the same family with your biological mother. And she sounds like a beautiful lady.

- - no1ladydj said
  - 10 May 2014
    9:12 pm
I’m incredibly lucky to know who both my biological parents are, as so many adopted people often have minimal information. It’s been an enormous help to me, both emotionally and physically (as I know about family medical history, which can be so important). I haven’t had to make the difficult decision of whether to try and find my birth-parents, as I know who they are (although my birth-father died 18 months after I was born). Lucky? Hell yeah, and even more blessed that I’ve been able to have a close relationship with my mother. I’m one of the lucky ones.

- - arcticwynta said
  - 10 May 2014
    1:49 pm
I think you are blessed to know your bio Mum..I also am adopted and all I have is my original birth cert and non identifying info on both my birth mother and father but he was not on my birth cer

- - hopefullyheidi said
  - 10 May 2014
    10:24 am
How very fortunate that you were able to grown up knowing your birth mum. She sounds like a wonderful person and so do her parents.

- - amal80 said
  - 10 May 2014
    10:23 am
Lovely story, it must have been a very hard decision for her, especially to put you where she had to see you all the time but also good I guess that she could still be a part of your life