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Whilst people look down on young pregnant mothers, do they ever stop for a moment to notice the fear, embarrassment or loneliness that is already apparent in their eyes and only slightly masked by their youthful, optimistic smile…

Even after that initial unexpected pregnancy news do you think that the joy of making future pregnancy announcements becomes any easier for some of them…

Or is every pregnancy of theirs tarnished by the way their first was conceived?

Personally I don’t believe they are given the opportunity to ever experience the pure joy, excitement or genuine support from family and “friends”- but honestly, do they even need it…

They have the courage which most people go through life never experiencing. They are capable of making things work in situations most of us are lucky enough never to find ourselves in. And they are able to show love at times when they are surrounded by hate.

Personally, I would much rather be the mother of an unexpected child than ever attempt to fit into cultural or social standards- I find it far more rewarding.

It’s Going To Be Painful To Be The Odd One Out

Here’s what I want all young Mother’s to walk away with – it’s going to be painful to be the odd one out. To be the black sheep of the family. And especially to watch your children being treated unequally to other family members at times. BUT, once you have them, that sheepish fake smile you used on all the people looking down on you is going to be shattered by the biggest smile you will ever experience- it will come from your soul and it will happen only when you look at those perfect children of yours- it will make your face hurt and your heart explode!

Things may appear impossible at first, you may feel isolated and alone, but you can achieve anything and the love of your children will take away all the hatred you were ever shown.

 

  • Great article and I support young mums as I was one myself. In the end I had four beautiful children by the time I was 26 and I have had a wonderful life as I have been young enough to enjoy my children and do things with them and to enjoy my grandchildren before I became too creaky to do so.

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  • A mum is a mum no matter the age or experience and all should be loved and supported.

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  • My best friend was a young mum. She’s an amazing mum and has been from the start. Now her child is in year 8 and she’s still excluded or left out by other mums when at school pick up due to the age gap. She’s obviously younger than the other mums and even years later and in her late 20’s now, the judgement is obvious. But the comments, judgements, being asked to leave the school she was at when pregnant, assumptions made about her and the isolation were horrible. Isolated from mums groups either completely or the hospital group of babies same age she was excluded by the other mums. Even community playgroup she stopped going as comments made by other mums or the silent treatment and not being included by other mums, she was isolated.
    Any new first time mum is vulnerable, fearful and needs support but particularly a young mum. Isolating and judging them does the opposite of support at their most needy. Great article. Hope it opens eyes and increases understanding.

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  • Isolation and judgement affects all mothers – young and old, large families and small. Sometimes it seems everyone has a comment.

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  • My heart aches for all the young, isolated lonely mums out there. Praying people will reach out instead of embarrassing them

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  • I was a young mum at 17 and really wish that I would have gotten a lot more support. Or even just be left alone instead of the looks and comments. 7 years on and a mum of four and it never stops.

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  • Bringing a child to the world is amazing but it’s a big responsibility that young women need to be prepared for and need a lot of family support

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  • Being a mum is a job you will have to hold down for a minimum of 18 years. It’s not a decision to be made lightly

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  • Yep, for those who it was an accident for. But way too many young girls get pregnant as a way to avoid working or to keep a boyfriend. That’s not a good reasons to bring babies into the world

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  • All pregnant mothers no matter what age, really need support!

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  • This is a good read, I can understand this.

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  • I hope people are more tolerant and accepting now. Family is family and each new addition should be celebrated and showered with love.

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  • Respect for young mummas, may we never ever look down on them ! Cause who knows their story ?
    My 8year old foster daughter has a 14year old half sister, who lives with her boyfriend and uses weed and is pregnant (prior to this pregnancy, she had 2 abortions). When we encounter girls like her, may we reach out.

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  • Young mummas, the love at first sight you will have when you meet them for the first time will wipe away any doubt or fear you had. I have never experienced more joy and true love until I had mine.

    Reply

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