First Time Mum Mocked After Sharing Rules for Visiting Her Newborn

New mum shares her list of 13 rules when visiting her new baby – including washing hands and helping around the house – is she being a diva?

Mumsnet user Frenchwolf86, came under attack after revealing the 13 rules she expects all visitors to follow when they come to meet her newborn baby, shared Daily Mail.

The guidelines include a change of clothes after smoking, no visiting if you have been unwell, no kissing or touching mouth, only visit if invited and even help out with housework in return for cuddles with the infant.

But the expectant mother has been mocked by other Mumsnet forum users, who joked that she wouldn’t get many visitors if she enforced the rules.

One said: ‘Is this for real? I doubt you’ll get any visitors at all if you issue that list of rules! Or is that the idea…? Ah, very clever OP. Keep the in-laws away, eh?’

‘Haha this has made me smile! I don’t think you’ll have many visitors,’ another posted.

A third said: ‘This can’t be real No one is this ridiculous.’

‘I guess these rules are yours. Try to relax a bit though if you can.’

A third said: ‘I sort of get where you are coming from with some of the rules, but I think it’s a bit excessive. If anyone does anything that bothers you, just ask/ tell them to stop doing it.’

mumsnet baby rules

The post has since been deleted.

Do you think they are reasonable expectations?

Share your comments below.

22 Comments

- - mom265671 said
  - 04 Aug 2018
    12:06 am
Being s first time mum I had exactly all these thoughts in my head. Good on her for voicing it

- - curlytops said
  - 03 Aug 2018
    9:39 pm
I wonder how many of her friends were allowed or invited to visit? could be a bit awkward!

- - mom111059 said
  - 19 Jun 2018
    10:49 am
I’d be a bit on tenderhooks if I were her mother in law or any visitor for that matter.

Fair enough no visiting when sick, kissing on mouth etc. thats a given I believe.

- - mom90758 said
  - 05 Jun 2018
    2:25 pm
I understand perfectly the first four rules. The one of helping around the house seems too funny to be real.
- mom93821 replied
  
  06 Jun 2018 , 5:34 am
  The funny thing is most people offer to help new mums/families without being asked to help!
  - mom90758 replied
    
    06 Jun 2018 , 5:52 pm
    
    Indeed. But here she “expects” that people help her just because they are allowed to touch the child. Very peculiar! 🙂
  - mom93821 replied
    
    07 Jun 2018 , 6:42 am
    
    I concur that is does seem peculiar.
- - becstalou said
  - 05 Jun 2018
    12:34 pm
Might not be my choice but you should get masses of leeway when you have a baby and any negative opinions don’t matter.

- - Amanda Holland said
  - 05 Jun 2018
    9:29 am
The only one I would be a little put out by would be helping around the house lol
I think these are reasonable though, especially the photos on Facebook

- - Ellen said
  - 05 Jun 2018
    7:43 am
Depends on how she sets these rules down. Most of these are just common sense and don’t need to be said or underlined, by doing so you might give people the feeling not to be welcome.

- - mom93821 said
  - 05 Jun 2018
    6:40 am
Surely just talking to people is a better way to communicate – do and do not lists always appear to cause problems. People need to have the courage to talk to people about their needs and rules for their homes. I imagine it just causes angst on all sides. Most people use common sense around new babies anyway. Bargaining housework for cuddles seems very odd to me!

- - Mum2archer said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    9:48 pm
Most of them seem pretty reasonable to me! But most are common sense 😉

- - nealsq said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    7:16 pm
all reasonable except for helping around the house

- - BellaB said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    6:56 pm
I actually think only number 5 (housework for cuddles) is unreasonable. The rest are quite fair. I honestly wouldn’t blink if a friend asked me to abide by these.

- - mom81879 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    6:42 pm
I never thought of having a list of rules for visiting my newborns, I wish I had. Thus list is very valid. Newborns are so vulnerable, we should do all we can to protect them

- - jools41 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    6:24 pm
The only one I thought was a bit rich was the expecting to help for cuddles. Most people would offer help anyway. The rest of them – fine by me, it’s her baby & she’s trying to find her best way.
- cherz replied
  
  04 Jun 2018 , 8:06 pm
  Very well said and I also agree.
- - ashna9 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    5:48 pm
Yes she has gone overboard. Some of these are valid, some of them are too much.

- - mom114371 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    3:41 pm
I don’t think the list is unreasonable, although helping around the house and not taking photos of the baby probably shouldn’t be on the list but at the end of the day it’s their kid.

- - mom206279 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    3:04 pm
I’ve heard a lot worse from new mums.

- - mom160421 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    1:46 pm
I think some of her requests/demands are reasonable and others are not. I don’t think this is something you post publicly though.

- - Staceylee101 said
  - 04 Jun 2018
    1:38 pm
Personally I wouldn’t straight up post that for everyone to see, id privately tell all those invited my wishes for when they visit.