I agree with your husband. No one should be asking you for money.
Sometimes we think that giving people money helps but in the long run it doesnt teach anything.
I know of a woman in her 40’s that has lived on constant handouts from her grandmothers. She has no idea how to budget or cope on her own. She spends money foolishly because she knows she only has to ask and Grandma will pay the bills for her. Whats going to happen to her when Grandma is no loonger there?

I agree with your hubby. You say they are distant relatives and former colleagues, then they have a hide asking at all. If you give and they keep asking it will stay that way. Just say you don’t work and can’t afford it. It will be interesting if they stay in contact after that.

If they are distant relatives and overseas friends, then they shouldn’t be asking for a handout from you in the first place. Immediate family are not doing this, so stop the habit and the money giving. They have to stand on their own two feet wherever they are, just like you had to do. Your money is for you to enjoy and your child – I am sure if the boot was on the other foot they wouldn’t be sending money to you.

Never feel guilty these people distant relatives and former colleagues from overseas are not in your daily life here in Australia. Asking for money is not on. Your family here is ever evolving and you have needs too. Your allowance your husband gives you is yours to do with as you will. Buying personal stuff and saving for a rainy day. Sometimes it’s best to drop people who do not value you and your daily life. We donate here and there only if we have the money. On one wage you live within your means by keeping to a budget and getting ahead means having to forego other stuff and if that is supporting old distant relatives and former colleagues from overseas then so be it. Enjoy your baby and feel very blessed.

I agree with Hubby. I would be telling them that not working and brining up a child has become quite expensive over the years, and you don’t have the money. You don’t want them to be reliant on you. I also don’t think former colleagues should be asking for money full stop.

I have to agree that it might be helpful to prior your friends and family members with financial assistance and knowledge on how best to manage money (as it sounds you have)

Another option is that you advice your family members to do a course in money management / learning to budget / learning to save money / debt management. There are plenty of online courses available that are free.
As long as you will keep providing, they will not take their own responsibility

If they are friends or family they should pay you back, not keep asking for more. Next time they ask tell them you don’t have any money to spare. If they are only being friends to get money off you, you’re better off without them in your life. I’ve given money to a few different people and reiterated it was just a loan. Once they got the money, they cut off contact with me altogether. Keep the little bit of money you have for you only.

I think you are entirely within your rights to block them. It doesn’t sound like you have much relationship with them other than them asking you for money, And nor does it really sound like you have a lot of it. So I would politely tell them that you don’t have spare money, and block them if they ask again.

The more you give mo way to these people, they more they will ask. I understand that some cultures do this to support family members but you aren’t working and hubby has said no. If it is bothering you a lot and you feel comfortable I would send them a note and just explain they really need to respect that you can’t help them and if they still co to use to ask, then block them.

I know in some cultures it is quite normal for people to support their relatives who are still living in the country of their birth, but in the end of the day it is entirely up to you if you want to do that or not. Once you’re in the pattern of donating money to them, you create a circle whereby they expect that of you. This might be hard to break, but it is possible. I would just be honest. You could for example share with them that you have your own family now and that you are a one-income-family who struggle to make ends meet.

Just write to them the cost of living is going up. You’re trying to make ends meet. Tell them to play lotto and win. Leave there. They will get the picture pronto. This should stop messages to you. If they keep hounding you, don’t respond. You have no obligation to.

I feel at the end of the day our responsibility is to just take care of our own family needs. Its better to block such negative people who just want to stay connected with you to gain benefits. I would personally not give a single penny to anyone and would save it for my future needs.

I feel for you. It must be incredibly hard. As you mentioned they are distant relatives. do they contact you to chat are they involved in your life even though they are quite a distance away? I would go with your gut. As you wrote this you are possibly questioning about giving them money. maybe only give some to your immediate family and if they feel they need to share this with the more distant relatives then they can as they would be seeing them regularly. if it is to hard and they only contact you to ask for money maybe block them.

I think hubby is right here. It’s okay if it is a one off, but if you have already given money to these people and they just keep asking for more than it is a thing where they are taking advantage of you. You are not working and should be able to use the little bit of extra for your family i.e. maybe a special outing with your child. If they are that desperate for assistance there are charities who can help them.

Go with your gut, hun. If you think you should stop communication because you don’t want to give them money, do it. You know your family and cultural dynamics better than anyone. Do you think if you were to have an honest conversation they would understand, or would the pressure still go on? Regarding the former colleagues, try to ignore that. Next you’ll have your neighbours neighbour contacting you too.