My 5 month old will only go to sleep while being held, then we “transition” her to where she sleeps, if she wakes, we have to start over.

She keeps hold of hands, hair or clothes and reaches out to make sure we are still there.

If we just let her try and go to sleep on her own she cries or whines until we pick her up again.

Is there any advice to make it a bit easier on us both?


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  • You need to put her into bed while she’s still awake.
    My biggest mistake in the first 4 months was holding and rocking my son to sleep. He got used to it but by 5 months, I had enough and started putting him to bed awake.
    With light taps on the nappy (soothed him), and long nights, he finally learnt to fall asleep in his cot without being held :)

  • I’d say to pat or just have your hand on her while she learns to sleep in bed. May take a little while but she’ll learn to sleep there eventually.

  • She has changed her eating and sleeping and is a bit whingey (out of the norm for her)

    Think it is all due to a growth spurt!

    Thanks for all of your advice!

  • It can be hard, I have been there. I found the Love Me Wrap a massive help as it made my son feel wrapped and secure without being as restricted as a normal wrap. I had to stand or sit next to bubs cot and just pat or touch him and I gradually did it for a smaller amount of time until he was able to self settle. Good luck and hang in there :)

  • Both my sons were wrapped as babies and we used to pat there belly or legs if they were unsettled rather than picking them up. This was all taught to me at sleep school so I would recommend you contact your maternal health nurse

  • Have you tried sitting next to the cot and patting her arm hand slowly and just Ashby every now and theN until she goes to sleep. Then as time goes on you can do it with out the tapping.

  • we had a similar problem. it was so hard but you have to be firm and walk away. as long as they are fed, watered, clean etc then the cry is just for you to come back. Good luck

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