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Article Giving and the ‘C’ word!

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As we get close to Mother’s Day, I think about those of you who have mums going through cancer treatment. I’ve been there myself, on both sides, as the supporter, and as the cancier patient. I know how hard it is to support someone following a cancer diagnosis, and to find meaningful gifts for cancer patients. Many of us are paralysed by saying or doing the wrong thing around someone who has cancer, but you know what, cancer is MAINSTREAM, we have to get over it!

Just last month, the World Health Organisation confirmed that cancer is now the biggest killer in Australia. This is horrible news, but the good news is that survival rates are going up. According to statistics from the National Breast Cancer Foundation, in 1994, 30% of the women diagnosed with Breast Cancer wouldn’t make it, today that figure is halved. So let’s stop whispering and panicking around the ‘C’ word and address it as something we may all face one day, and which is very much part of all our lives.

So, how can you help?

Co-ordinate 

1) Your loved one love you, and would love you to drop off food/help with the kids/drive them to appointments, but they can only deal with a couple of people when they are going through cancer treatment. Work out a roster with your circle, and let one person co-ordinate that so everyone gets to help, but so only one of you at a time is in direct contact.

2) Arrange for one person to be the point of contact, and to send around regular updates to friends and family, so the cancer patient doesnt have to field dozens of calls and emails.

Gifts for cancer patients

1) Beyond the first four bunches of flowers, they really start to be more of a hindrance than a joy, all the smelly water and dropping petals. If you want to send flowers, dont send any for the first two weeks after a cancer diagnosis, and then maybe arrange to send a bunch a month for the course of treatment, by that time, they will be rare and special!

2) Absolutely no scented candles or cosmetics!

3) Food is tricky, tastes change (or disappear) but a box of organic fruit and veggies may be welcome, and again, something that can be co-ordinated by a group on a regular basis. Hell, even if they can’t stomach it, their vistors or nurses will!

4) Sensual luxuries – perfect. When you can’t eat, or are too tired to do anything, something soft next to your skin is one of the only sensations you can enjoy. Cashmere is beautiful, beanies, socks, shawls. Cashmere beanies are the best chemo headgear (see me in mine above!) they can almost make you appear normal 🙂

5) Non-toxic skincare, make-up and nail treatments are all wonderful. Skin goes through strange changes during chemo, and burns during radiotherapy, but read the ingredients carefully as many familiar brands are packed full of petrochemicals.

Finally don’t be shy and don’t panic, they know they have cancer, feel free to mention the word, but be thoughtful around your activities and your gifts. And always, ALWAYS, apply anti-bacterial spray before a visit!

 

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Comments

  • I know so many wone going through this at the moment. My nan died of breast cancer it is such a sad thing. Thanks for the tips on making it more special for them

    Reply

  • I don’t know anyone with cancer these days, but love this list it is very helpful

    Reply

  • Very touching article I lost my mum last year to cancer so this touched my heart dearly thank you for sharing.

    • thank you, I am very sorry for your loss, and I’m sure you were a great comfort x

    Reply

  • Very helpful suggestions – thank you. It can be hard to know how to help.

    Reply

  • Thank you for this wonderfully thoughtful article to help us all have a better understanding of what gifts can be given and how to approach somebody going through this.

    Reply

  • A box of organic fruits is a great gift. Thank you for great info 🙂

    Reply

  • Lovely article, very thoughtfully written

    Reply

  • A lovely read, I think we forget about all of the sick people in the world at times

    Reply

  • Thanks so much for sharing your story, we are all touched by cancer in some way unfortunately ,I personally lost my father, my gorgeous Nana and too many people taken eat before their time, great tips you’ve passed in on your article. And congratulations to your on beating cancer.

    • I’m sorry to hear about your personal experiences, but I’m sure you were a great comfort x

    Reply

  • Good info but also wondering why no scented candles?

    • hi ladies, thanks for your thoughts and feedback. My experience is that with myself, and close friends going through chemo, strong smells can really turn your stomach, as can flavours. Also in terms of scented skincare, these also contain more chemicals than you really feel you want to be exposed to when you are so fragile already.
      People can always keep the scented candles and use them after chemo though I am sure 🙂

      • Ah thanks for clarifying for me 🙂 I haven’t had anyone really close to me go through this so very helpful to know if i ever do. Thanks 🙂

    Reply

  • Why no scented candles or cosmetics? Surely any gift is thoughtful? Know some people who totally loved scented candles as gifts when they were diagnosed.

    • hi there, as above, all gifts are thoughtful yes, but I’m sure like in morning sickness, there’s a risk strong smells and flavours will turn your stomach. Chemo is very rough and so it can be safer to avoid.
      Scented candles can always be enjoyed after chemo I am sure 🙂

    Reply

  • This is great information for a stressful time in life, thank you

    Reply
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