I agree with the father; his daughter and her husband are out of line with their expectations. The fact that they simply bombarded their expectations on her father without discussing it properly before is simply shocking and immature. They shouldn’t have set a baby into the world when they are not ready to make the commitment

WOW… in no way should this couple expect anyone to care for their child. These discussions should have taken place long before they even tried for a baby. Its very rude and entitled to expect anyone to look after your child without asking. I agree that they should not be having a baby and getting angry because others wont look after it for them.

What a horrible bunch of people. The father said he was happy for them he did not say I am here at your beck and call. There was no asking, there was no conversation around child care it was just expected from them to dump their kid onto granddad. I think he conveyed his thoughts just right. Parenting is hard through any generation. Some people today don’t want to lose everything they currently have and expect others to do the heavy lifting for them. He is not the A***ole. If they are not willing to look after their own child they shouldn’t have one.

Bobby needs to enjoy his life now and enjoy his grandchild. He’s shouldn’t have to be expected to look after the grandchild when they work. Maybe a discussion about it and maybe one day a week have the grandchild.

The new parents are entitled and selfish to expect grandad to babysit so they can work. Grandad is still very.young and would also likely work. One thing to mind a baby for a couple of hours, another for an entire work week.

Having parents/in-laws who are great grand parents it’s a privilege. They should not be taken for granted!

You are the grandparent not the parent so no.

I think its a privilege to have a grandparents who can look after grandchildren. We can’t expect that or demand

NTA Bobby. Their decision to have a child equals their responsibility to care for their child.
Maybe the delivery could have been softer but honestly if I was the one being blindsided like this, I may have reacted the same way.
Good luck to all involved.

Grandparents, I don’t think should be ‘stuck’ with the babysitting duty while the parents are at work. As mentioned, they have done their time with the young ones and shouldn’t be enforced, unless the grandparent is happy to.

If they didn’t want the responsibility of raising a child I agree she shouldn’t have gotten pregnant. If she expected her father to look after her baby, she should have spoken to him before she fell pregnant. By the sounds of it her and her husband are being the selfish ones. Bobby could agree to one or two days a week that he chooses.

Yikes. A lot of assumptions and not enough communication going on here

I don’t think this is a conversation that should have been had at the party. It is his retirement to live as he likes he shouldn’t be expected to look after anyone, they should have asked first. If they didn’t want to be stuck with a baby they shouldn’t have tried and succeeded in getting pregnant.

Bobby is not the a$$, he is the only one being the reasonable adult explaining the situation. It’s their child, they should look after it. He could baby sit occasionally on a one off etc. He could have maybe not have had the conversation at the party however.

My eldest is almost 25, my youngest 12 with two in between. I have told my daughter “I’m still raising my muffins, I won’t be looking after any cupcakes”

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  • • mum1 replied
    • 19 Jul 2022 , 1:44 pm

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  Lol! That’s the best line – love it

No the grandpa to be isn’t in the wrong. Amanda and Chris were obviously trying to have a baby. It’s their responsibility to provide for and look after, not the grandpa.

Bobby is not the a_hole.
If they wanted Bobby’s assistance with babysitting when they are at work or out for “fun” then they should have had that conversation with him and not expected him to do it.
Maybe he could have waited until they were not at a party to let them know he would not be at their beck and call as a babysitter, but I don’t think he was being that harsh. Parenting is a big responsibility and it will change your life

I don’t think the granddad-to-be is wrong. It’s not easy to babysit newborn these days. Why don’t the daughter asked the in-laws??!!

I think Bobby is entirely reasonable. I think it’s fine to ask/expect grandparents to babysit once in a while for a couple of hours. And by once in a while I mean every few weeks or months. Anything else should be off the table unless they specifically offer.

I can relate to you, because I was also asked to do this. My husband just said “don’t do this to us, I’ve just retired and we want to be free to travel around and do what we want” which got me out of it fortunately. Much as I love our grand children I don’t want to be looking after them too often. You could suggest like we did to use a daycare service which turned out to be a great idea.