The bride needs to be accommodating for someone who has just had a baby.

There is no way she can expect a new mum not to be with her newborn. They are a unit. Newborns are easy to accomodate, It’s when they get to a few months that it gets trickier having them out.

Give your friend a way out so no-one’s feelings get hurt.

…yes.
There is no justification.
When we did it, we invited her parents (and obviously husband) to help while we did the photos.

I think you should talk to your friend who may also be having second thoughts about even being your bridesmaid. She is probably trying to work out a way of letting you down graciously because I am sure I wouldn’t want to be there in that capacity if I had just given birth. I can see all sorts of problems – the bridesmaid’s dress won’t be able to be fitted and checked and the baby might come later than expected or earlier or her waters might even break at your wedding ceremony. Have a heart, and give your friend a way out of this catastrophe.

maybe if the newborn can be looked after quite close to the ceremony. hard one

I think if you ask your friend to leave her newborn you will need to find a new bridesmaid…

I don’t think a newborn can be left without it’s mum for that long…

Absolutely if a newborn. They’d most likely sleep the whole time

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  • • RA1234756 replied
    • 15 Apr 2024 , 8:44 am

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  Great point!

What a great friend you are 2 weeks old and leave the baby behind .Wait until you have children opps sorry I dont think you will have any children

Toddler maybe i could understand but a newborn should not be expected to be left without their mum unless it was the mum’s choice to do so. Having a newborn is stressful as it is. If you’re a close friend she should understand.

She has to realise the bride’s maid probably won’t be there. You can’t expect a mum to dip out on a newborn. Not an ah to ask.

I agree, I’d sit down with her and have an honest chat, chances are she’s probably stressed about it herself.

First of all you don’t know if the bridemaid is going to make it, she could be overdue or have birth complications. But if she can make it I wouldn’t push it too far. I would ask if her partner can come along and watch the baby when mum can’t watch it. A newborn needs to be close by it’s parents at all time. Have an open conversation about it together.

I’d be sitting down with her now and asking if she still wants to be in the party. She may have worries herself being due so close in time. I understand but as a good friend I’d be letting the baby come, just asking that her partner, or the person caring for the baby during the ceremony, keep to the back. In all honestly, she may not want to bring her baby and may be having second thoughts.

Communicate on this. Given the baby is due just prior to the wedding, she may not even be able to attend the wedding. Good chance she’ll be giving birth on the day of the wedding

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  • • mom93821 replied
    • 11 Apr 2024 , 5:09 am

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  Communication is key and this needs to be done immediately and with sensitivity.

A newborn baby needs to be fed and attached to the parents and it is not practical for someone else to care for the newborn. It would not bother me to have a newborn at the wedding and it would highlight the circle of life.

I think a conversation needs to happen with her regardless, about what she wants and what the bride wants, baby is due 2 weeks before … baby may very well arrive on wedding day
I think depending on the anticipated length of the ceremony it may be possible for a family member to watch bubs away, outside etc. The entire day I wouldn’t feel comfortable asking someone such a thing
I attended a wedding and watched my 6wk old nice as my sister was a bridesmaid, it was outdoors and I stood right at the back away from the main part, I then attended the reception with my sister and don’t see why that would impact bride at all.
I understand it is the “bride’s special day, but the world doesn’t stop for one person and everyone experiences birth/newborn phase differently.

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  • • Ellen replied
    • 11 Apr 2024 , 8:23 am

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  I agree with what you say, it’s the brides special day but the world doesn’t stop for one preson

I’d say she’d possibly not go, not many people are willing to leave a newborn with anyone. Nor have they mastered expressing milk. They’re dead tired too. You’d make her feel uncomfortable like you don’t want her baby around. New mums lose heaps of friends it’s sad. It’s up to you if you don’t want 1 extra baby at your wedding or not.

To be honest, she might not go before the wedding or she might not feel up to it after having the baby.
Me personally I would allow it being a new born