Mother of three was taken aback when she was recently told by an old friend that she had “let herself go”.

Amy Weatherly, 34, initially laughed off the comment she received – “I can’t believe I’m seeing you out in public with no makeup and tennis shoes. Who even are you anymore?”

She responded with, “Yeah, something about that third baby really forced me to let myself go” as a defence mechanism.

She then took to Facebook to share how it really made her feel.

“In a past life, in a galaxy far, far away, I was the girl who only wore wedges and trendy tops. I was the girl who was never without makeup and big hair. I was the girl never without jewelry, and lip gloss, and loads of foundation. I had myself together,” wrote Weatherly.

“I kept thinking about my words, they kept rolling through my head over and over that day and left me feeling like crap: “let myself go.” I knew I didn’t look the same as I did before, but had I actually let myself go? Ten extra lbs and a messy bun would point to yes, but my heart screamed “HECK TO THE NO YOU HAVE NOT, GIRLFRIEND.”

Amy shared, “I’m more confident now. I’m more sure of myself. I’m less likely to cry over a breakout, or miss out on a night with my girls because of dirty hair. I’m less likely to slip into a mild depression because someone decided they didn’t like me, or pile on the insecurity because I wasn’t invited to that party.

“Truth is, I kind of like myself now, definitely more than I did before. I wouldn’t go back to that girl with the good hair for all the skinny jeans and skinny lattes in the world.

“Why do we continue to use this phrase? Why do we continue to call out moms and grown women just because they don’t care about keeping up with the Kardashians and the Taylor Swifts and the Barbie dolls of the world any longer?

“If we step back and think about it and keep our judgmental mouths shut, there’s a good chance we’ll find they haven’t let themselves go at all. There’s a good chance we’ll discover they have in fact found themselves and appreciated themselves and loved themselves and realized that who they are as a human has absolutely nothing to do with their fake eyelashes or their highlights or their giant leathery feathery earrings (which, I still love, by the way.), and absolutely everything to do with their heart, and their mind, and their soul.

“There’s a good chance we’ll uncover they’ve peeled away the outer layers and realized they were okay with the girl inside — the one who loves her family with everything she has, the one who selflessly gives to her children, the one who adores her husband, the one with passion, the one with hustle, the one with friends, the one with grit, the one with a giving heart, the one who cannot be kept down no matter what life throws her way.

“The world shouldn’t be putting her down. The world shouldn’t be worried about her. The world should be standing up and applauding her like crazy. The world should be working to follow in her fierce footsteps towards freedom.

“So the next time you personally start to get down because you don’t look the same, or dress the same, or feel the same as you did two/five/ten years ago, I hope you’ll remember this:

“You haven’t let yourself go. Stop saying that. It’s rude. It’s derogatory, and it’s downright absurd. You haven’t let yourself go, you have simply let go of the need to look perfect all of the time.

“You have simply let go of stuff that isn’t important and traded it in for stuff that will leave a lasting legacy. You have simply let go of stuff that will last a little while, for stuff that will last for generations and generations and generations.

“Put on makeup when you can, get your hair did when you find the time, pamper yourself, take care of yourself, splurge on a new outfit and don’t you dare feel bad about it for one second — just know that none of those outside things define you. Not anymore. They aren’t you. They are things, and there is a huge difference between the two.

“You are more than just a pretty face.

“You are a momma. You are a wife. You are a sister. You are a lover. You are a fighter. You are a warrior. You are a daughter. You are a student. You are a teacher. You are a dreamer. You are a doer. You are giver. You are a believer.

You are you, and that can never be taken away from you.”

Her post has attracted over 1000 reactions and nearly 400 comments.

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  • the happy photo says it all, friends that don’t understand that don’t matter


  • Sounds like her friend does not understand her as a true friend ‘


  • Busy mums……do we care what others think of our appearance?! As long as our kids are healthy and happy, that’s what’s important


  • She looks just fine this other girl doesn’t seem to be a great friend after all but we sometimes grow apart due to life taking us different paths.


  • This is perfectly said!! ????
    What makes you you is so much more than skin deep! How you feel, act and live is a personal choice and the way you look should never define who you are as a person.


  • You are living as you choose to – not as others expect you to. You aren’t putting pressure on yourself to live up to their expectations and snobbery. You’re not putting all those unnecessary chemicals on your skin and in your hair. You are natural – not fake.


  • Good for her! Who needs friends who make you feel like crap anyway?


  • What a beautiful way to express what motherhood is. That woman who commented so badly about you is certainly no friend. She is too shallow. Be proud of yourself and your family


  • Quite simply that friend has to go. Someone that would insinuate that, would no longer be my friend.


  • What a lousy friend, well then I have let myself go too. When I’m not at work I go around without makeup and real ‘daggy’ clothing.


  • Not a real friend then is she?! Perhaps she was thoughtless about the comment but truthfully, no one needs friends like that. Choose to surround yourself with people who build you up and have your back no matter how crap you look – they’re the ones you want! Plus, anyone who calls out a mum of three for her appearance should have runners on themselves – I can’t imagine any of my friends standing there taking that comment!!


  • That’s just rude, I am so happy not wearing makeup anymore


  • How incredibly rude. Whatever happened to if you have nothing nice to say……


  • When I read this article I really can’t appreciate the judgemental words of this old friend “I can’t believe I’m seeing you out in public with no makeup and tennis shoes. Who even are you anymore?”
    The other side of this story is that Amy admits that she was the girl who only wore wedges and trendy tops, the girl who was never without makeup and big hair, the girl who was never without jewelry, and lip gloss, and loads of foundation. the girl who had herself “together.” Thing is that when we do these things all the time, we’re actually keeping up a facade and carry this out to those around us. So then the question this old friend is asking “who are you anymore?” is actually quite realistic, something like “which one is the real you” ?
    I’m glad Amy has let go of the need to look perfect all of the time !


  • So right there.
    You have become a mum, so yes you aren’t going to get “doll” up everytime you go out. As a mum, you need to wear something comfortable…flats for when you need to chase you toddler who has ran off.
    This so called friend obviously doesnt have children so she wouldn’t know what it feels like to be a parent.


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