Daycare Dilemma - Real Mum story on MoM

9 Comments

I’m extremely happy with my child’s daycare centre. I had to wait 15 months to get a spot. Honestly never waited that long for anything in my life! It caused me a lot of anxiety – the possibility that I might have to go with a centre that I considered secondary to this one so that I could return to work. My child has developed, progressed, made little friends and most importantly I feel very supported by the staff who tell me my child is very happy there. (I’ve spied on her through a window when she was playing and I have to agree with them!) Being my first born there have been some instances where I did not know she could do certain things – for example follow simple instructions, pick up things she has thrown, put things in the bin, etc. I’ve been doing all this for her! The centre has been good for me but great for her. Now, I’m on maternity leave with number two and I feel this sense of guilt that I am home and my child is not. I’ve been recommended to keep her in as long as I can afford it by both parents in my situation and the centre itself. She is very active and requires a lot of stimulation, unfortunately I do not have a lot of the resources the centre have and she has been learning a lot from the other children (another thing I cannot provide!).

She eats, sleeps and behaves better at the centre than she does for mum and dad too. Which, makes me feel like a bad parent. Friends with toddlers assure me this is just the way it is with toddlers?

When I return to work next year, I’ll need a spot for both children, on the same days. Which may or may not happen as the centre does not prioritise siblings. If I reduce her days, will I be disadvantaging her? I’m not sure which is easier to deal with – the anxiety that she could lose her spot or the guilt that she is there, not here.

Posted anonymously, 28th July 2015

9 Comments

- - RA1234756 said
  - 20 Apr 2023
    2:13 pm
The centre is telling you to keep her there because they want to make money off you.

- - mom81879 said
  - 24 Jan 2017
    12:47 pm
The waiting lists for childcare are ridiculously long. And childcare is very expensive. I have no idea how families with more then one child in care can afford it

- - dbhall82 said
  - 25 Sep 2015
    4:28 pm
I think it’s good that you leave her in there it gives you some bonding time with your new baby and some fun time for your toddler!!

- - mom94125 said
  - 23 Aug 2015
    1:02 am
phew! what a long time to wait

- - EllenG89 said
  - 31 Jul 2015
    6:52 pm
Being a Kindergarten Teacher I would suggest keeping her there as long as possible. She is forever learning and flourishing and it is great for her stimulation also. You need time to bond with your new baby – don’t feel guilty about that. Enjoy it! Good luck

- - mom56312 said
  - 31 Jul 2015
    1:03 pm
Dont feel bad use this time to bond with bubs number two, and make sure the babies name is already on the list to attend next year., if you have to reduce the amount of days she is there, but make sure you still have her in a few days a week to keep her place. Make the most of your time at home as you will back to work before you know it.

- - mum4107 said
  - 30 Jul 2015
    5:51 am
I have not been in this situation but I have friends that have. They reduced the number of days their child was attending. Good luck

- - mom93821 said
  - 28 Jul 2015
    8:19 pm
I have not experienced this situation, but hope you get some good answers.

- - BellaB said
  - 28 Jul 2015
    4:24 pm
I definitely suggest you keep her there. It’s great for her, and I really think kids benefit from at least some daycare – as you say, they get different stimulation to what they get at home. Neither is better or worse, but it’s great if you can give them both.