Did any other mothers kick themselves as much as I am?

My waters broke at 39weeks whilst in the hospital for an appointment due to testing positive to Strep B I had to be induced that evening. After 6 hours of inducement I was taking in for an emergency c section due to babies heart rate continually dropping. My little
One is now 5 months old and I still find myself being negative against myself for my birthing resulting in an emergency c section, I am so upset and disappointed in my birthing.
1. Not being able to have my mum with me which I think would have been my biggest support and guidance through labour.
2. Not being able to get an photos of our first moments
3. The treatment during my c section and after was horrible.

Am I being to much on myself?

Posted anonymously, 8th November 2020