I wish my sister picked a better man

15 Comments

My sister has been with her boyfriend for 3 years and they have a child together but for the whole time I’ve known him all he does is treat her like rubbish.
For what I have seen and things she has told me about that has happened behind closed doors is disgusting and I’m getting to the point where I’m either going to say something to him myself or im even tempted to let the authorities know about him.
Im also getting to the point where I don’t want to hear about anything new he has said or done and he is no longer welcome in my home.
He is the type of man that is very sneaky and sly, he lies to my sister all the time, he takes her last bit of money she has for the week to buy things he doesn’t need, she takes his phone everywhere and I mean everywhere he goes and it’s always on silent, he has his phone bills and bank statements sent to his parents house so my sister can’t read them. He spends a lot of time in the garage with the doors locked and the list just goes on and on.
He has also told my sister that she is not allowed to come to my house because he thinks i will brainwash her and tell her to leave him (which I tell her all the time anyway) it’s just driving me nuts.
The only reason she hasn’t left him already is because they have a baby together and my sister and I both know what it’s like growing up in a broken home.
I just wish he would treat her better and get along with the family because I dont know how much more I can handle. I just hate him so much it makes me sick.

Posted anonymously, 20th February 2015

15 Comments

- - june11 said
  - 02 Apr 2017
    9:35 pm
I don’t think your sister is really happy or she would tell you all the things she does. If she is staying with her boyfriend for the sake of their baby that may be a big mistake if the atmosphere is not good in the home. Does she take his phone or him take hers? Does your sister tell her boyfriend what you say.., have you had a lot to say to him…..or has he got a guilty consciense???

- - mum888 said
  - 01 Jan 2016
    8:54 pm
Its understandable because you love your sister and you don’t want to see her hurt. I think being there for her now is good enough until she knows when enough is enough . Whoever said love can be blind is very true and perhaps for now she just needs some security and maybe suggest to her if she is willing to see a counsellor if you think she needs it emotionally . She is very blessed to have a sister like you .

- - mom57522 said
  - 15 Jun 2015
    8:55 pm
My sister had a similar boyfriend, eventually all sh** hit the fan when it was discover what sort of things he was getting up to. If and when they break up, make sure your sister has all her i’s dotted and t’s crossed when it comes to custody arrangements. It has taken my sister 3 years, a lot of money and heartbreak but she finally has her kids back and they can longer be used in ‘his’ game.

- - mom113055 said
  - 03 May 2015
    1:11 pm
great to read

- - smiles said
  - 25 Apr 2015
    7:50 pm
Make sure that you keep up contact with your sister so she does have someone to turn to when she needs. If the boyfriend tries to cut off all ties to her friends it will isolate her and if things get worse she will have no one for support.

- - hopefullyheidi said
  - 28 Feb 2015
    9:14 pm
I can well understand why you would hate him. He sounds like he has his own interests at heart first and fore mostly. Your sister will more than likely come to a point where she cannot physically be in the house any longer, and for you to be there to welcome her with open arms will be amazing for her. I have had some experience with this sort of thing. Wonder what’s going through the guys parents heads to let him send his bills to their house. He sounds like a man child to me – sorry to be blunt.

- - jenniw said
  - 23 Feb 2015
    1:55 pm
How difficult it must be for you to watch your sister go through that. I hope that she finds the strength to leave as it sounds like that would be the safest thing for her to do

- - mom93821 said
  - 23 Feb 2015
    7:03 am
The term ‘broken’ home always makes me sad. There is no such thing as a broken home. Homes and families are all different in so many ways. The most important thing regardless of the make up of the family is love and respect. Unfortunately; your sister has chosen this man as her partner and all you can do is stress to your sister what a good relationship ‘looks like’.

- - mom111362 said
  - 23 Feb 2015
    1:21 am
doesn’t sound like a good relationship. there needs to be love, respect and both parties to be happy! can you speak to a councellor? having my own issues, I wish things would improve. men are hard to change.

- - Kelly said
  - 22 Feb 2015
    4:55 pm
I think i would rather my baby grow up in a broken home with one loving parent than in a home where the parents dont get on and argue or the atmosphere is horrible.
I think you just need to be there for your sister and just hope that she sees through him soon enough and be there for her when it happens.
good luck i really hope everything turns out ok for your sister.

- - Moonberry said
  - 20 Feb 2015
    11:54 pm
A broken home can be much happier & healthier – if the parents make it so! I came from a broken home, and I was quite happy growing up.

The situation your sister child has, is much more damaging that being a part of a broken home! For 3 years he has done this yes? Well, he won’t change.. She needs to get out before it is too late.
- Newmum21 replied
  
  22 Feb 2015 , 7:40 am
  Thank you for your comments. I agree that a happy broken home is better than an unhappy intact home, it’s just my sister didn’t want her son to miss out on any important father & son moments. I wish she would leave him too, but then I also know that he would make it really hard for her to leave.
- - BellaB said
  - 20 Feb 2015
    4:37 pm
A happy broken home is better than an unhappy intact one.

- - mom103936 said
  - 20 Feb 2015
    9:09 am
So sorry to read this story. He does not sound trustworthy at all.
It is hard to leave but sometimes a broken home is not so bad. It can actually be better if it is not a good environment to live in. Im guessing that she is very unhappy as well.
- Newmum21 replied
  
  22 Feb 2015 , 7:44 am
  Thank you for your comments. You are 100% correct that he can’t be trusted!! I wouldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him! My sister is very unhappy but she is getting to the stage where she doesn’t care anymore and she just lets him get away with everything he does because she can’t be bothered fighting with him.