Sometimes I wish I wasn’t a mum. - Real Mum story on MoM

14 Comments

First of all, thanks for this section on your site. I love reading stories from other mums because it’s good to hear that others are in the same boat as me. I don’t really have a scary birth story or any near death experiences but to be honest, I sometimes worry there is something wrong with me.

The bottom line is that sometimes I really struggle to find one thing enjoyable about being a wife and mother. I didn’t really used to be like this when my kids were small but it seems the older they get, the busier I get and I find I lose my temper easily and completely lost the plot! I always thought as the kids got older, it would be easier – they would help out around the house, we’d sit and chat and I’d start getting more sleep.

The trouble is that when the kids started getting older, I started thinking I could fit more in so I got a part-time job (which is actually more than part time). Of course I wanted to make sure my kids didn’t miss out so now I spend my life juggling, stressing and running from one thing to the next.

Some days I just wish for the days when I could sit on the couch and watch TV. Hell, some days I just wish all I had to do was the ironing. And some days I long for those long afternoons between the lunchtime nap and night time bedtime where I actually wondered how we would fill in the time!

I don’t think I’m a pioneer – most of my friends seem to be busy too. I just think they cope with it better than me. Maybe they don’t really but I feel like they all do. I don’t think I’ve shouted so much in my life than I do now. So I think I’m at the point where I need to ask for help. Although so much of me feels as though that will make me a ‘failure’. I guess I need to move beyond trying to manage this myself and actually find someone who understands. I guess I’m worried they’ll whack me on drugs and I’ll become some loony lady who picks up the kids in her pjs …

OK I’m going to do it. A happy mum is a good mum right? I’ll report back soon and let you know how it’s all going. Thanks for just listening (sometimes it’s good to know someone is listening/reading without judging).

Posted by NicNacNoo, 20th February 2013

14 Comments

- - kcjfamily9 said
  - 27 Jul 2016
    7:16 pm
Your not alone!

- - BellaB said
  - 30 Apr 2016
    11:29 pm
I think we ll feel this way sometimes.

- - dannsbuild said
  - 26 Sep 2015
    2:59 pm
Thank you for sharing. Very interesting!

- - blondie said
  - 11 May 2015
    8:42 pm
Your not the only one out there feeling these things. I do hope that things have improved for you. thanks for this story.

- - mom113055 said
  - 25 Apr 2015
    8:17 pm
top storie great

- - mom113055 said
  - 11 Apr 2015
    2:19 pm
nice story to have a read

- - mom94125 said
  - 06 Mar 2015
    2:43 pm
i wonder how you are holding up? let us know how you are feeling

- - moncat72 said
  - 25 Oct 2014
    9:03 pm
I understand that life sometimes doesn’t work out the way you expect. And raising kids is a lot like that. There is no quick fix to your dilemma and it seems to me that what you are feeling is worn out, tired and unappreciated. It’s okay to feel stressed out and that you have no time to yourself. But what you do about it is what’s important. It’s great that you put your family first, but when it comes down to it, if you are out of action, who is going to hold the fort together. I just think that you should take some time out for yourself and make sure you do something for yourself at least once a week – like taking a long, hot bubble bath or asking the kids and your partner to help you out. You don’t have to be a super mum and do everything on your own. And asking for help is by no means a reflection as to how good a mother / wife / colleague you are. Everyone is human and its okay to feel that you are out of control and out of your element. It’s natural to not be perfect, so embrace yourself and give yourself a pat on the back. You have been managing to keep it together and now you recognise that you need some help. Don’t be afraid to ask for it and share your experiences with your friends. You might be surprised to hear that they are feeling the same. Women are so good at hiding their true feelings when they don’t need to. Find support in your family and friends. And be kind to yourself.
- mom57522 replied
  
  26 Oct 2014 , 7:56 pm
  Moncat72 I like your advice. Something must of us could take on board.
- - mom56842 said
  - 28 Sep 2014
    10:33 pm
That’s quite sad that you feel like this, I hope you seek some help – hugs.

- - meimei said
  - 25 May 2014
    4:23 pm
It would be get better. Wishes all the best for you.

- - no1ladydj said
  - 13 May 2014
    1:23 am
There’s nothing wrong with asking for help. You’d be more of a “failure” if you didn’t ask for help. Talk to your GP and ask for referral to a psychologist, which is different to a psychiatrist, because a psychologist can’t prescribe you medications, where a psychiatrist can. Possibly all you need is to talk to someone who can help you find the answers yourself.

- - kylesnova said
  - 14 Apr 2014
    11:28 am
Good luck. Perhaps you would be happier if you weren’t so busy, is there anything you could give up – even for a while? And having depression and taking medication if necessary is a much better option than the alternatives.

- - jodie80 said
  - 21 Mar 2014
    10:56 am
being a mum is hard for all of us but it get better