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Article 5 ways to stay sane when moving house with teenagers

By Sheree Jones
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16 Comments

Moving house at any stage of your life is a stressful undertaking. If you happen to be moving when you have kids in the mix, then you will reach a whole new level of stress!

Most teenagers will find moving house an extremely unattractive proposition; changing houses, schools and friends is a huge deal to a teenager who probably will feel like their whole world is ending.

Try the following tips to make the transition a little easier to all involved.

Be open and honest about moving house

From the outset, honesty is always going to be the best policy when dealing with a teenager. You may be worried how they are going to react when given the news that they are moving house, though keeping it from them will only make it worse.

Teens are old enough to be part of a discussion about why it is necessary to relocate and the pros and cons for doing so. Knowing the real reason why it is necessary may help them deal with it, especially if it’s something they’re not keen on doing. Encourage your teen to be honest about their feelings on moving and share your feelings too, they may be surprised to know that you feel the same way! Making new friends and trying to fit into a new social circle is difficult at any age so it may be helpful for them to realise they’re not going through it all alone.

Involve your teen in decisions about moving house

Letting your teen feel like they are a part of the decision making process and that their opinion matters will do a world of good. Although ultimately the big decisions may be out of their hands, they can certainly have some input and know that their point of view has been considered.

They are probably experiencing a huge amount of frustration due to the lack of control over their own lives so to be included and listened to will help them to accept the changes coming. Let them help you when searching for a new house or choosing your removalist – most teens are highly proficient at searching online, and they may actually end up helping you more than you think!

Image source: supplied

Enable them to keep in touch with old friends

For most teens, their social circle is a huge part of their lives. A lot of the angst of moving will because they have to leave behind their friends.

Luckily with today’s technology, it’s easier to keep in touch than ever before. Encourage your teen to keep in contact with their friends as they make the move to their new home and start making new friends. Their old friends will still provide a valuable support network and can be easily contacted by Facebook, Skype, Messenger apps, and email. Providing your teen with their own mobile phone or computer for this task will no doubt be greatly appreciated by them.

Research your new town/city together

There’s certainly no need to be all pessimistic about moving house. Often it is an exciting time and the change may be looked forward to.

Whether your teen is all for the move or is more reticent about their feelings on it, a nice way to spend some time together is to do some research online together about your new home town. Check out where your local library, shops, cinemas and parks are. Exploring all of these are a great way of integrating into your new community. Your teen may like to look for local skate parks or hip cafes / bookshops which should be easily found on popular websites. Doing this together may encourage your teen to open up a bit more about the way they are feeling.

Keep busy, busy, busy!

By the time moving day arrives, when you are moving with kids, you may be ready to tear your hair out. It is certainly a day when you will want to be ultra organised and make sure everyone knows what they are meant to be doing.

Don’t leave your teen standing on the sidelines, get them involved with helping you out!

If you are moving with a shipping container, maybe they can help load it up, or if they have younger siblings, maybe they can be in charge of entertaining them while the removalists are at work. Keeping your teen busy on what is probably a difficult day for them will do them much better than moping about.

As all parents know, all kids are different, and certainly all teens are different. Some will look forward to moving, others will hate the prospect. Just remember, whatever their outlook, they will require support and understanding from you to get through a difficult and stressful time. With a positive outlook, hopefully everyone comes out the other end of the move happy and ready to settle into their new home.

Have you moved with kids or a teenager? SHARE with us in the comments below.

Main image source: Shutterstock

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Comments

  • I have been in this house for 30 years. Moving would be so very stressful.

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  • Great tips !

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  • I believe that communication is key.

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  • We haven’t moved with a teenager, but expect to in a few years. He will definitely be part of the discussion and the whole process. It’s how we operate in our family.

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  • It’s easier to move house when children are younger. We moved when one was 7 and the other 3 hadn’t started school. We kept on about how great an adventure it was going to be and there was little trauma. Because we were moving from a busy city to a country town it meant that bike riding would be more easy to do and more friends would be made in a smaller environment. Would have hated to uproot teenagers though.

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  • The older your children get the more they will miss their friends. This is also true for the parents ! Aw how I miss my precious friends spread out over all the world. I hardly get to hug them or my family. It makes my heart ache sometimes.

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  • Maybe you can let your teenager help with the packing of her things. With any luck it may be a good time to purge things no matter wanted or needed by themselves or other family members. It can be decided whether to give the suitable ones to other people they know or donate them to a charity. Some old worn out clothes and bedding may be appreciated by an animal shelter. Some shelters will arrange to pick them up.
    Packing to move is a good time to do the same thing in each room if you haven’t recently done so. If you have furniture, toys, bric-a-brac etc. you might consider a garage sale. It is also surprising what items so Opportunity Shops sell or what Community Centres can use to help people who use them.

    • I agree. Moving house is always a great time to declutter!

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  • Excellent article. We moved to a new city a few years ago and although it was stressful, it has turned out to be a good choice.

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  • No we haven’t moved house since my daughter was born

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  • We moved different times. The last one when my daughter was almost 10 years old. The older they get, the more they will miss their friends. On that side it was a lot easier when she was younger.
    We involved her in all the choices we made. She helped packing, deciding what to keep and what to give away, she went to most of the open houses with us and we highly valued her impressions.
    It’s surely a stressful time, but very exciting too!!

    • Yes, I thinks it’s easier for kids to adjust the younger they are. That said, it’s handy to have older kids to help with choosing a new home and give their opinions.

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  • great article, we have younger children and have moved a bit in their short lifetimes. It’s hard to keep in touch with their old friends because not many people use snail mail and things like that which would be fun for the kids. I can only imagine it getting harder on them when they get older.

    • My kids LOVE snail mail. We try and encourage friends and family to send them postcards and letters as they enjoy getting them so much.

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  • When i was young we moved house so many times it was tiring and annoying. Hopefully i never have to move again. The last time i moved was 4 years ago when i was pregnant and it was the worst few weeks ever

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  • Useful tips, it seems wise to get your teenagers involved from the beginning and communicate with them about the what and why and all the planning and the actual move.
    I didn’t move with teenagers bit with very small kids, which was very stressful too. Just to go through all the stuff, organize and pack already is very hard with small children who love your attention all the time.

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