A mum says she can’t understand why her ex won’t let their son bring his stepbrother on a father-son camping trip, given that the stepbrothers have such a strong bond.
The woman says she and her ex divorced when their son was six. When he was eight, she began dating her current husband, who also had an eight-year-old son.
“On the day my son met his stepbrother they stood in front of each other, sized each other up the way little boys do, and were silent for a moment. Then my son asked, ‘Do you want to play Smash Bros?’ and his stepbrother said yes, and then ran upstairs. It was fraternal love at first sight. They’ve been attached at the hip ever since,” she explained.
“My stepson’s mother passed a few years ago, and my husband was actually reticent to introduce me and my son to his two kids, because he thought it was too soon. It turns out that where some kids get a pet after a parent dies, my stepson and stepdaughter got a brother.
“The first year we were all together my stepson asked if my son could come along when they visited their mother at the cemetery on her birthday, and he spent the whole car ride over telling my son all about her, and it seemed therapeutic for him. Later that night I checked in and saw that my son had climbed up to the top bunk and they had fallen asleep curled up together.
“Before she entered her current 7-going-on-17 phase my stepdaughter used to crawl into my son’s lap as often as she did my stepson and ask them to read to her.”
Both of the boys are now 11, and she says her son’s relationship with his father isn’t a particularly close one.
“Since the divorce my ex-husband has been unreliable at best. He cancels on my son regularly, making some excuse about work or what have you. The twice monthly weekend together have trailed off to the or four times a year. Every time I have to tell my son his father cancelled, my stepson goes to his father and asks if the three of them can do something together.
“One of the few things my ex-husband likes enough to always follow through with is camping. My son loves camping as well, and he’s the one who convinced my stepson to join Boy Scouts. The thing is, this year he wants to bring his stepbrother along.
“I told my ex-husband this and he got upset, saying that it’s their time together and he doesn’t want someone else’s kid along with them. He says that it’s supposed to be the two of them bonding.”
“I told him he’s had plenty of chances to bond that he blew off for one reason or another, and that he should consider himself lucky that he has such a compassionate and sensitive son and that our son still wants anything to do with him. He hung up on a huff.”
The woman’s ex-mother-in-law also got involved, calling to voice her opinion.
“His mother called yesterday to complain that I was expecting my ex to just sit their while my son and stepson went off on their own and ignored my ex completely, and said that I need to look at it from his perspective since he only ‘gets’ to see our son a few times a year.
“For obvious reasons this annoyed me to the point where I hung up. My husband says that he gets it and thinks I should let it just be the two of them. Am I the a**hole?”
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shan90 replied
- 01 May 2023 , 1:32 am
Reply4:33 am
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