If she doesn’t want her MIL in there, than that needs to be respected. I am sure the hospital would back her up on that. Delivery is not a time to be adding extra stress into a situation.

You’re the one giving birth, you get to choose who is there. I’m sure you husband wouldn’t want his MIL there if it was him giving birth… Sounds like he hasn’t really thought about it from your point of view and he is not taking your feelings into consideration. I think maybe he needs to stop being a “mummys’ boy and start being a “husband”

Nope that’s not bad at all! It’s your labour, your decision

Nope, you should definitely feel comfortable in your own space when you are in labour

I don’t think you’re wrong at all. Your husband is being childish making demands on who should be in the room when you give birth. If you’re comfortable ask your husband if he would be willing to have the birth filmed for you MIL to watch at a later date. If your MIL didn’t realise he wanted her in the room then maybe he wants her there for him? Hope he gets in contact soon and everything is sorted before the day. Does he not realise the extra stress and pressure he’s putting you and your baby under?

Sorry for your problem – if he ever returns your calls, tell him you only want him there. Do hope it all works out for you.

Of course this is not wrong. It’s her body.

No, you are not wrong. Birth is a personal time, and it should be shared with your husband or partner, not the family, unless you want it to be that way.

Just agree to just have your hubby there no one else! Let the hospital know strictly you want No one else there. Especially someone that’s going to cause more stress in an already stressful time. Happy birth-ing.

Many of us missed out on pretty much everyone coming thanks to covid so I’d say that to her

My MIL came in for my first birth when she shouldn’t have been there she had “dropped in” to see how I was doing (and shouldn’t have) and stayed on purpose till the end. My mother was there to support me during my labour and couldn’t say anything cause she didn’t want to start a disagreement while I was in labour. To make matters worse after I gave birth when they placed my son on the weight table she was the first one to take him off and take a photo!!! So no!!! Definitely a No for MIL!!!! I made it clear to my husband after our second child that he better not dare to allow his MIL anywhere near me or all hell will break loose!!!

I wouldn’t have my MIL in the delivery room, it would be so weird. My mum wasn’t even there

Having a mother-in-law present would be so uncomfortable. It’s a very vulnerable position that a mother is in and you definitely don’t want someone that you don’t know very well seeing everything.

The whole idea of people being in the room are so that they are there to support you through giving birth. I would have another chat to your husband and makes sure he understands that and make it clear that having your MIL in the room wouldn’t make the birthing experience easier or more comfortable for you.
In saying that. Maybe he feels like he needed someone there to support him. The birthing experience can be scary and overwhelming for the expectant father too. My husband wasn’t even in the birth suite with me and wanted to wait outside (although a lot of people couldn’t understand this, I figured he wasn’t going to be a good support for me if he didn’t feel comfortable being there. And I needed people who were going to be a good support – so my mum was there)
Maybe negotiate and say your MIL can be at the hospital but outside of the room for when he needs to step out and take a moment to collect himself and see her.

This is so hard! Yes it should be the woman’s choice but if she had her mum in with her first then I think it is only fair he has his for the next one. Why is is reacting so much over it though is concerning, especially if his mum didn’t even know he wanted her in there in the first place. I personally don’t want anyone in there but my husband.

It’s definitely the woman’s choice.

I guess from his point of view your mum was there so why can’t he have the same deal? Perhaps if it had just been him the first time he wouldn’t have been upset this time.
Your best bet is to find out from the hospital how many birth partners you can have at the time. I’d also possibly consider a compromise of your mum not being there this time. Or suggesting that you were hoping MIL can watch your firstborn. Ultimately at the end of the day it’s your decision who is and isn’t there! And you certainly shouldn’t have anybody there that you don’t want! But also consider how the situation may affect your marriage and whether or not your husband will be petty enough to miss the birth.

She’s pushing the baby out so it’s her choice.
I wouldn’t want someone in the delivery room with me whom I didn’t have a good relationship with.

She has every right to feel that way for sure!!

Well, first of all I can’t believe her husband has left her, pregnant and with another small child, with no indication of where he is. And secondly, I really think the person doing the birthing gets to choose who sees them in that state.