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Article ‘Another Mum Sent Me A List Of Things I Did Wrong, After Her Daughter Stayed For A Sleepover’

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A mum has been left fuming after she was sent a list of things she did wrong from a fellow mum, following a sleepover.

The 41-year-old mum says her 15-year-old daughter hosted a sleepover with four of her friends and from everything she saw on the night, the girls had a great time, had lots of fun and were respectful.

“Most of the girls’ parents thanked me and my husband for hosting and said positive things, but one texted me a list of all the things I did wrong,” she explained.

“I received the complaining mum’s text on the day after the sleepover. The text said,

Thank you for having my daughter over. It was generous of you to open up your home and graciously host her. However, I feel that many of your decisions were questionable and inappropriate.

“She then proceeded to list her objections with specific reasons for each one.”

The first concern the mum had was that the teenagers went swimming in the family’s pool. But the mum who hosted the sleepover said all of the parents were aware the girls would be swimming.

“When the sleepover invites were sent out via text message, I asked the mums if they were okay with their girls going swimming. All of them said ‘yes’ or ‘that’s okay with me’ except for the complaining mum, who simply liked my text. I assumed this meant yes.

“I would not have allowed this had the girls not been forced to pass a swimming safety unit (which included a swim test at the end) for their PE class. Additionally, my husband completed a lifeguarding course from the Red Cross and passed with flying colours.”

The second issue the mum was concerned about was the ‘unhealthy’ food her daughter ate.

“I however, did not see an issue with this because I think eating junk at sleepovers is okay. The next issue was the movie the girls watched after dinner. Since some of the girls are 14 and others are 15, we told them no R rated movies, but other than that it was up to them. They ended up choosing The Fault In Our Stars, which the complainer deemed inappropriate.

“The final thing she was mad about was the fact that the girls didn’t actually go to sleep until midnight. As a mum myself, I understand because I want my daughter to get enough sleep. However, both my husband and I do think that sleepovers are a time when it’s okay to stay up late, provided the kids let the parents sleep (which my daughter and her friends did). Additionally, the girls woke up at 8:30, meaning they got about 8 1/2 hours of sleep.”

The mum decided to address the issues in her reply text, writing:

Please tell your daughter thanks for coming! She was a pleasure to host. I understand your concerns, but considering that you never communicated your expectations or rules, I don’t think it’s fair to place the blame on me. If we ever do things like this in the future, please make sure to let me know of any restrictions ahead of time. Thank you and have a lovely weekend!

But according to the mum, things didn’t go well.

“She then responded angrily that it was my fault, and when I texted her to say sorry, she didn’t respond.”

Now the mum wants to know if she was in the wrong for not taking the blame. What do you think? Let us know in the comments below. 

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Comments

  • I don’t see how you did anything wrong. If you aren’t told what the children can or can’t do then that’s the Mum’s fault, not yours. Don’t let it bother you.

    Reply

  • That poor kid will never be invited to anyone’s house again! Back off mumma!

    Reply

  • I hate the thumbs up! I’ve been burnt by family who’ve don’t the thumbs up to a message from me and then proceeded to loose this s…

    Don’t just do the thumbs up people!

    Reply

  • I feel for this mums child as she is going to have a hard time retaining friends if her mum continues to criticise other parents.

    • Yes, I can imagine this is hard for this child too

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  • I think the complaining mum is the type of person who is probably never happy. It sounds like the girls had a great night and she really ought to be thankful that she got to have a night off…

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  • Oh wow! No don’t take the blame. I wont comment my true thoughts of the mother complaining! Annoyed me reading this!

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  • Simple. Don’t bother with her again. Just don’t invite the daughter to any future events. You will never win with a person like her.

    • poor child, then this daughter is the dupe

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  • I just think the other mother should of just said no too future invites. At 14 if she doesn’t want to swim, not a good swimmer, or the pool too deep she should not of been able to attend, if she can’t be trusted to make safe choices.

    Reply

  • You and your husband were gracious hosts. Sadly this woman’s daughter may not be invited to sleepovers in future. You did everything right and it sounds like a fantastic sleepover. A rite of passage for teenage girls. Ignore this Mum, she is the issue.

    Reply

  • Wow, that’s just horrible. If the mother had so many issues about the sleep over maybe she should respond to the invite with her concerns or just not let her daughter go. These girls are old enough to make some decisions and if that girl knew she couldn’t have junk food then maybe she shouldn’t have eaten any nor swim if she wasn’t aloud. The hosting mum is NOT in the wrong.

    Reply

  • I had once a parent who responded in a like wise way. When I listened to all the things he didn’t agree with , I told him it’s perhaps time to stop doing sleepovers with us and I waved him bye bye

    Reply

  • Oh this isn’t great. To be honest if the mum had so many restrictions she should have thought twice about sending her daughter for a sleep over. I like having control and I struggle to think what my 8 year would get up to at somone else house so I just don’t allow them to happen…

    I think the response the mum has drafted is perfect

    Reply

  • I don’t think any of that was too unreasonable.

    • You’re joking right? Maybe there’s 2 of you out there that are just too hard to please. I found the mother’s comments totally unacceptable. If she was so worried, why didn’t she get in touch with the hosts and query them before time? I find it really sad that people will complain about anything behind their keyboard but won’t say the same to someone’s face. She’s being very unreasonable and I pity her daughter because she won’t get invited if her mother is like this.

    Reply

  • She sounds like a mother that needs to find an issue with everything or is an extreme helicopter parent, I wouldn’t let it get to the OP. Just keep doing as you are doing, if she had a real problem with it she should have told her instead of just “liking” the message.

    Reply

  • Just let it go. Not worth any more time in my opinion.

    • Yes letting go is the wisest decision you can make in situations like this

    Reply

  • I think she handled it all very politely. That Mum seems to just be a trouble maker. Sounds like the girls had a great night.

    Reply

  • The host handled this situation so well, I am not sure I would have been so polite. The fact the mum liked the message and never took the time to respond is plain rude. I hate when someone doesn’t acknowledge a message and puts a like or a thumbs up, it is disrespectful, to then have the nerve to write her that message is beyond rude. I think the other mum needs to grow up and take responsibility.

    Reply

  • Holy moley! The host mum handled that very well. But my gosh!

    • Yes, respect for this host !

      • She sure did, I am not sure I would have been so polite.

      • No, I’m not sure if I would either

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  • I think you were very calm and a lot more polite than I would have wanted to be. I feel so sad for the her daughter as this would be very embarrassing for her especially if it came a topic of conversation amongst her peers.

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  • The host mother is absolutely not in the wrong here. If the other mother had specific things she wanted, she should have communicated this or simply not allow her daughter to attend the sleepover. Sleepovers are meant to be fun and eating fun food and going to bed late is all part of what makes it a great experience. I think the host mom was very respectful in her reply.

    Reply
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