Dad jokes for this Fathers day

With Fathers day a little under a month away, it’s time to start thinking about what to get dad.

Aside from presents though, how about you teach your kids a few of these ‘Dad jokes’ to give him a taste of his own medicine!

Q) Milk is the fastest liquid on earth…

A) Its Past-ur-eysed before you even see it

Q) Our wedding was so beautiful…
A) Even the cake was in tiers!

Q) What did the dad’s tie say to his neck?
A) Can I hang around?

Q) What’s ET short for?
A) Because he’s only got little legs

Q) Why do crabs never give to charity?
A) Because they’re shellfish

Q) Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?
A) Because it was well armed

Q) A sandwich walks into a bar, the bartender says…
A) “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”

Q) What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A) Pull the pin and throw it back!

Q) Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
A) Because they have no-body to go with

Q) What did the 0 say to the 8?
A) Nice belt!

Q) A man walks into a bar and orders a helicopter flavour of chips, the bartender says…
A) “Sorry mate, we only do plain”

Q) I’m reading a book on the history of glue…
A) I can’t put it down

Q) Where does batman go to the bathroom?
A) The Bat-room

Q) What cheese can never be yours?
A) Nacho Cheese!

Q) What type of organisation is Atheism?
A) A non prophet one

So there are a few bad dad jokes to add to your arsenal this fathers day. Comment your BEST ‘Dad joke’ below!

45 Comments

- - meedee said
  - 18 Sep 2021
    9:04 am
Yup….they are all 100% Dad jokes

- - rachel1970 said
  - 04 Sep 2017
    8:02 pm
oh dear, very lame fathers day jokes- I LOVE THEM!

- - rovermum said
  - 04 Sep 2017
    1:18 pm
Just what I need! More bad jokes for my son and his Dad to torment me with !!!

- - tessie said
  - 03 Sep 2017
    7:24 pm
Some old, some new but still funny

- - Ellen said
  - 03 Sep 2017
    4:12 am
My kids love jokes, especially my son !

- - mom90758 said
  - 01 Sep 2017
    3:36 pm
I always find entertaining reading Dad’s jokes. This is one I love:

Why did the phone wear glasses? It lost all of its contacts.
- VernaB replied
  
  01 Sep 2017 , 6:28 pm
  Hahaha got a laugh out of this one 🙂
  - mom90758 replied
    
    03 Sep 2017 , 7:32 am
    
    Eh! Eh! I am glad you like it! 🙂
- - wozza69 said
  - 01 Sep 2017
    2:40 pm
Q. What did the farmer say to the cow on top of the barn roof?
A. Get down!

- - mom101628 said
  - 13 Sep 2016
    10:48 pm
Love them all.

- - deb_gs said
  - 12 Sep 2016
    6:43 pm
These are typically corny jokes which are great for dads. My husbands favourite: Why did 6 cry? Because 7 ate 9.

- - rovermum said
  - 05 Sep 2016
    5:51 pm
My son will love these new jokes to add to his repertoire. He’s in need of some new ones!!

- - ella12 said
  - 05 Sep 2016
    3:49 pm
An interesting lot there are, thanks.

- - VernaB said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    9:49 pm
Haha i got a laugh out of these.

- - nealsq said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    8:16 pm
Oh I love a good (bad) dad joke heheheh I have had a few eye rolls in my time hahahah

- - mom134803 said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    1:20 pm
Have to show this to my son, he’ll love these ????

- - mom134467 said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    12:11 pm
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick

- - mom112217 said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    10:48 am
OMG some really bad Dad jokes here!

- - mom64356 said
  - 03 Sep 2016
    9:33 am
My daughters love these types of jokes, I’ll show them later! 🙂

- - mom113055 said
  - 15 Oct 2015
    10:15 pm
dad jokes

- - Toni Rowland said
  - 30 Sep 2015
    9:21 pm
Some of these are hilarious.

- - jellybean01 said
  - 16 Sep 2015
    10:00 pm
these are definitely dad jokes lol