Dealing with weight loss frenemies

Losing weight can be a long and often difficult journey.

Like any journey, it’s more difficult if you’re going on it alone. Weight loss is especially hard if your family and friends, those who are supposed to support you every step of the way, seem to resent you for your lifestyle changes.

Changes to diet and lifestyle can be hard for others to accept. The kids might complain about the green diet and the lack of pizza, or maybe the husband misses that weekly steak and chips dinner.

Many find that their diets are compromised by the dietary needs of those around them.

It’s not just the weight loss “frenemies” that pose a challenge, either. Sometimes people sabotage their own weight loss efforts. Anecdotally, women have told me that after succeeding at losing a significant amount of weight, their new life (and identity) seems alien and strange. This can cause them to revert to old habits for the sake of familiarity.

Most often, people find their own resolve disintegrates in the face of their family’s inability to understand their needs. The only way to solve that problem is through open and honest communication.

If you’re looking to lose weight and it feels as if absolutely everything and everyone (including yourself) is against you, the best thing to do is to talk to your family about what you need from them.

Another way to increase the chances of weight loss success is talking to someone outside of your immediate family circle. By telling someone other than your partner or closest friends, such as a nutritionist or a dietician, you’re increasing your accountability.

The more people you tell, the less likely it is for you to back out of your promises.

The most important aspect of weight loss is that people don’t feel like they’re going at it alone. Having someone to support you, professional or otherwise, makes the road to losing weight that little bit less bumpy.

Weight loss, like so many other areas of life, is easier when done together.

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37 Comments

- - ChiWren said
  - 10 Dec 2023
    7:48 pm
Great advice here. I always try to vocalise my goals to try and keep accountable. Sometimes I wish I hadn’t, especially when I tell hubby I’m going without sugars after dinner for a stretch of time haha.
And it’s so interesting how some people, even friends, don’t want to see you win if they aren’t winning. It can be hard not to let that negativity get to you.

- - ella12 said
  - 21 Feb 2018
    2:21 pm
Having support is always great, thanks for the article.

- - mom81879 said
  - 17 Nov 2015
    1:47 pm
Isn’t it funny how so called friends go out of their way to try sabotage your life choices? My hubby has give up alcohol and smoking and the number of ‘friends’ who invite him round for a drink is unreal!

- - mom109229 said
  - 30 Sep 2015
    10:06 pm
This was an interesting mini article. Thanks for posting!

- - smiles said
  - 30 Apr 2015
    10:20 pm
Wait loss is so much easier when you have a supportive partner or someone you can do it with.

- - mom103936 said
  - 03 Mar 2015
    11:57 am
I am lucky to have a supportive family!

- - smart_ass said
  - 29 Jan 2015
    8:34 am
great read

- - 222jodes said
  - 26 Jan 2015
    7:56 pm
A great read and some really interesting comments.. Story of my life is the battle of the bulge.. I’ve gone from 240kg-95kg with diet and exercise but now I’m stuck.. Any idea’s?

- - mom94125 said
  - 08 Jan 2015
    11:10 pm
also keeping the weight off for the long run

- - linaianna said
  - 29 Dec 2014
    8:44 am
Great read thanks for sharing this article

- - linaianna said
  - 15 Dec 2014
    9:56 pm
Great reading thanks for sharing this articke

- - Missie said
  - 01 Dec 2014
    9:05 pm
2 years ago I was 70 kg and jogging/walking 5-10 kms a day, and very fit and healthy. I then injured my back seriously and this was so detrimental to my all over health. Today I am 86 kgs diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and have just had a Hysterectomy. I am still recovering but have set out a recovery and health plan to get myself back on the straight and narrow. Not a full blown 3-5 hour workout everyday but simple exercises and walking, just to be able to get back on the horse.

- - mish06 said
  - 20 Nov 2014
    1:00 pm
Thanks for sharing. Losing weight can be such an emotional time.

- - shortaez said
  - 26 Oct 2014
    5:02 pm
I’m currently trying to lose 10kgs and sort of proving hard to do

- - june11 said
  - 19 Oct 2014
    11:57 am
I have to start walking more, as much for exercise as for weight reduction. I had a bad cough a few weeks ago during cold weather which initially thought was only a hayfever allergy cough which I always get when there is a few high pollen count days (so I have just discovered). This time it lingered and my nose blocked up instead of running. I got a chest infection. It took me a month to get rid of the cough. I know I have lost a bit of muscle tone too as when I walk more than a few metres my legs feel stiff.

- - Lov'n'Life said
  - 17 Oct 2014
    5:10 pm
I went to a dietician who after I had lost 9kgs in 4 months and still needing/ wanting to loss another 14kg told me that I was not lossing weight quick enough and if I was doing everything that she had told me there was little more she could do and told me not to come back. ( very disappointed)

- - Jacki said
  - 17 Oct 2014
    4:53 pm
I’ve lost 36kg. I lost that in 7 months. Was quite easy even though I constantly cook a meal for me & then a separate one for hubby & then another one for my son. Son does not always like what his dad has & vice-versa so it means 3 meals at times. It all comes down to willpower.Either you have it or you don’t. Even then you can cook one meal for the family & as long as it’s within a particular amount of calories for the day then it does not matter.
- mom94125 replied
  
  19 Oct 2015 , 2:15 pm
  yeah congrats to you. that is a lot of effort.
- - mom60497 said
  - 13 Oct 2014
    7:40 pm
I suggest finding a weight loss group on the internet – there are lots on Facebook. On there, you will receive heaps of support from people going through similar things to you.

- - Gurtling said
  - 13 Oct 2014
    2:59 pm
I just smile and let them think they are happier than me

- - moncat72 said
  - 12 Oct 2014
    8:25 pm
Don’t let anyone deter you from your goals. If they truly love you they will accept and support you no matter what.