I guess you could just say that you refuse to name her Mildred but you are ok with Milly or Millie. Thats the compromise that you will make and if he cant accept that then you both need to find a totally different name and forget Mildred all together.
I honestly think these things need to be sorted out before marriage. My husband was a nightmare with naming our kids also

I can understand why you wouldn’t want to use your MIL name for your daughter when you didn’t have a nice relationship with her. I would give him a comprimise and insist on it being a middle name. That way it doesn’t have to be used all the time. Another way to comprimise might be to go through your MIL family history of female names and see if there is anything there that you both like and have that name as a first name and Mildred as a middle name.

I can completely understand her feelings here I am often at odds with my mother in law and feel bad that my hubby is caught in the middle. He has always been close with his family and I had hoped to be close with his mum as I wasn’t with my own, but she makes it hard…

These things are all about compromise and I’d settle on MIldred for a middle name.
I understand how you feel towards your MIL. My hubby wanted to call our eldest daughter after his Mum and I had to compromise and give it to her as a middle name.
I wish you all the best, I know from personal experience how difficult it can be.

I would compromise and make it a middle name. That way your husband can still tell your daughter when she grows up the significant of her middle name. On the upside middle names are only to be used on documents and you won’t need to hear it every day 😉

It’s a rather old fashioned name and IF you had to use it I would make it Millie but since she was so troublesome to you, I’d push for it being a middle name. Maybe suggest any future children could have family middle names (or a variation) as a nod to people that are close to you?

I feel a bit sorry for the dad, but I’m totally on Mum’s side here.

What about Milly as a middle name? Its a nod to the name mildred but not the same and its not a name you will use until the child is in trouble – thats the only reason we have middle names inour family to know when we are really in trouble!

Why would you want to call your child SILLY OLD COW get with it be strong and give your child the name that makes you happy .After all you are the one doing all the hard work

Only way I can see around this is to have Mildred as a middle name

This is a tough one. I’d say compromise and actually name her Millie rather than Mildred if it was just the name that was the problem but because she was so horrible to you I can understand not wanting to do that either. Maybe Millie as a middle name? So you don’t have to say it lol..

Your husband really loved his mother, obviously, so a compromise by using MIL’s name as your baby’s middle name would probably be the way around it. Do hope all works out well for you. Maybe you will be surprised and have a boy.

Personally I think that both parents should agree about the name

The middle name might be the compromise but you are definitely not the a hole! Could it be a nod by using Milly?

I understand how you are feeling and I agree with you. It’s a pity you didn’t secretly record it so you could prove to him what it was like for you. You are the one who is giving birth so you should have the final say.

I love the idea of using family names as middle names, but hearing how she treated her would be a hard decision

I was going to say compromise with the middle name, but after the way she treated you, I can totally understand you not wanting her name included anywhere. Ooh, this is a tough one, but you are not the a-hole at all.

Need to compromise – make it the middle name at least

I completely agree with the mum on all counts. It’s a horrible name for a modern baby, and if she has bad associations it should be totally off the table. Could she handle it as a second name?

There sure are some names that are out of fashion for a reason. I had a sweet great-Aunt Mildred, but would never name my daughter that. Maybe Millie as a middle name (or second middle name).