Just be happy with your new partner of 10 years. Let bygones be bygone and history aside. It’s your son’s and his bride occasion and make it their day!! Be happy and enjoy.

I get it, I do, but if your ex has stayed with this woman even though she has put on weight and not aged well, consider that he actually does love her and that the way you look isn’t going to make one jot of difference! I’m also concerned at how your current partner feels about it all. Forgive and Forget are three great words but if I had been in your position I don’t think I could do that either but nor am I going to let his past sins control me. Live your life how you want to otherwise you are still dancing to his tune. Are you really considering wearing something your ex would like over something you’d like?

Tend to agree with the comments. It’s been that long, let it go. Be happy. It sounds like you both are

So sad the damage that affairs cause so many years after the event. I feel for this mum and the insecurity she has had to deal with after her ex made a selfish decision all this years ago. That said, be happy with your new partner and life and leave people who have hurt you behind.

Enough time has passed love. Move on, be hsppy

Sounds very immature to me. She should just dress to make herself feel good about herself and not to out-do someone else. Clearly she is still holding a lot of hurt and resentment after all these years.

There is not one perfect type of body or way of dressing, it doesn’t exist. Everybody looks and dresses different and that is beautiful. People can have different shapes and sizes, but being happy and healthy is far more important than the looks. Your value really doesn’t hang on your looks, but on your heart and the person you are. Throughout the years the opinion about the ideal looks has been changing (about body, hair, nails, teeth and clothing), often these are temporary trends which we don’t have to follow at all.

I agree that you should dress to impress but for your partner, not to try outdoing your ex’s wife. Go there and enjoy the day for your son and DIL to be. If you are just doing this to outshine your ex’s wife then you won’t enjoy yourself and you will end up miserable. The only thing that matters is your son’s special day

Any woman who has a negative comment about this woman is lying to herself. We have all, at one time or another, tried to look better than another woman to win. It is the female psyche. It is also her way of feeling like she can get revenge without ruining the wedding. It might not be the best idea, but it is womanhood.

You’re still obviously carrying a lot of hurt and resentment even after 15 years and honestly it’s something you really need to let go of to find true happiness. A relationship is not all about the way you “look” anyway. I would honestly suggest some counselling to help you forgive and move on.

I doubt the ex husband will care. This lady should focus on her own happiness, not on revenge.

You should want to look amazing on such a big day regardless. Heavens above, it was 15 years ago, move on

She needs to just focus on making her son’s day the best possible day for him and his bride. Forget the ex husband and what you want to do to show him what he missed put on. He left her for this women, and never came back to his wife. Does that not say it all. Basically he does not care or give a damn.

I think Anita Butterworth is living out all her own fantasies here in the forum my god the stuff she puts here true or not tell me she has some serious problems and needs some help. Maybe we could all get together and make some suggestions how she could do better . But I must say she has the true qualification that lot of Aussies have. Bullshit .

I feel your best accessory is your partner of 10 yrs ..show up looking amazingly dressed yes but also most importantly have and show a loving and sincere relationship with this new guy. Are you out to win your ex back? If not and you really care for your new man let it show. Also prove you are a caring person and have moved on and show some respect and nice feelings towards your ex’s partner. Dress in a lovely summery floral with classy boots and make sure your make up is natural but flawless also have your hair coloured and styled.

No matter how you look he may only have eyes for his new partner. You may just come out looking bitter and vengeful. It’s all about your son this time. Focus on that. Maybe this sort of behaviour is why the relationship crashed in the first place and you haven’t learnt from it. Let it go.

I very much doubt that he had the affair over your looks compared to hers. That might be something a guy would do but it wouldnt last. The fact that he is still with her and has built a relationship that has lasted says that it was more then just your looks. He left because the two of you didnt gel. Forget trying to make him jealous.

Do you really think this ex husband would think he made a mistake and made a f*ck up when he looks at his ex trying to impress him with her looks and out do his new wife ? I think this woman might just lose a little more respect and attraction for her ex husband and by her current partner of 10 years too ! And that at the wedding of their son….

• • 
  • • Ellen replied
    • 27 Sep 2024 , 8:26 am

  ---

  If you dwell on hurtful events or situations, grudges filled with resentment and hostility can take root. If you allow these negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by bitterness or a sense of injustice and I assure you, you will look less beautiful ! Some people are naturally more forgiving than others. But let go of these thoughts and focus on the wedding of your son: for your son’s sake, for your own sake and to respect your ex and his wife

I think it’s probably time to move on and not put so much energy into your ex and his wife. I mean definitely dress up and look great but do it for yourself!

You should just want to look for for yourself. If you’re really in a happy relationship now this shouldn’t matter. And people don’t just cheat for looks, he obviously loves this other woman, he had stayed with her all these years. I think you’re sad.