I wouldnt worry about it at all. Just smile and shrug and move on. its not important

Mum in law should keep her comments to herself. Better to spoil than neglect.

This seems so common. I think our mothers and mothers in law want to share what they’ve done in raising their children partly to feel validated and partly to be helpful. I think it helps to acknowledge what they have to say but then politely choose not to follow their advice.

Not to me, but I wouldn’t put it past some family members to say it

My kids have been called spoiled by my mum. I think it’s a generational thing.

A mother has the right to spoil their child and it’s no ones business. I don’t think the mum has been to her child.

No as I don’t spoil my kids

This is ridiculous – there is no such thing as spoiling your child!

I can’t see anything this Mum is doing that is spoiling her child. Taking him to swimming classes is a great idea and I’m sure every Mum would do this if they could. As for baby massage classes, that is only going to help this Mum settle her child if he is restless. Maybe the MIL is a little jealous they she couldn’t do this when her children were in their infancy.

I can see what she’s getting at but “spoilt” is the wrong word. “Privaleged” is probably a better choice. In other words you have a very lucky baby. I am a daughter-in-law myself and a mother-in-law so have been through it all. My advice is to just laugh it off and say “yes she is very lucky isn’t she” and try not to let it worry you too much.

I wouldn’t call a child spoilt because a mother is spending time doing things for him/with him. I wish I had more time to spend with my kids and doing swimming lessons and learning baby massage are great bonding opportunities. I didn’t need to enroll in baby massage though, it was shown to me at a mother’s group that was free and run at a local child health clinic. The swimming lessons are a great way to build a kid’s confidence in the water. That being said I didn’t start mine until they were older and could actually learn to swim. But hey, if you have the time and money, why not?

Yes. He’s an only child and was often called spoilt. I don’t care. He has been spoilt with our love and attention and has grown into the most incredible young man.

mother in law can get lost, your child your decision

• • 
  • • Ellen replied
    • 14 Feb 2020 , 8:51 am

  ---

  

  Lol you say it as it is 🙂

Learning to swim is a must have – not a question of spoiling the child … in fairness though, different generations always tend to refer to ‘how it was in their day’ and a little tolerance should be shown to our elders but, in turn, they should refrain from commenting on how parents raise their own children ….

Six months old! Spoilt! Really!

I think 6 moths of age is a bit too young to be labelled spoilt. Most grandparents spoil children as do parents especially at that age. I don’t think its a big deal. I wouldn’t take offence at what she said just move on.

I think what plays here as well is different generations different upbringing. It could just help you to bring things in a slightly different perspective and not get all upset about it.
When I was a child me and my sisters did go to sports/gymnastics and music after school, but sure didn’t attend baby swimming or baby massage course. And when I would go a generation back my mum had non of those. It’s not always easy for the older generation to grow and develop with their time.

How is swimming lessons spoiling a baby? It’s a skill all kids need to know

I’d be pointing out that learning how to swim can save a child’s life. Hardly spoiling them when it could save their life one day. Nothing wrong with treatign your child every now and then, it’s just a another way to show love.

It frustrates me when grandparents have strong opinions