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Naming a baby is one of the most personal decisions a couple can make, and there are often plenty of opinions flying back and forth from well-meaning family and friends.

But this expecting mum says she’s being pressured to let her husband’s best friend name their child, and it’s causing a rift in her relationship.

“My husband’s best friend Will is infertile. He got divorced two times because of it and because he lied and hid his infertility,” she explained on reddit. “And his life hasn’t been the same the day he was told he can’t have kids. He has always had a soft spot for children and when he found out that my husband and I are expecting, he was so thrilled and started buying us gifts and decor pieces that he made from his woodwork for the baby.

“My husband thinks that those are all nice gestures but I couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable especially with how much he keeps mentioning the baby.”

And it seems the mum-to-be was right to be a little wary of Will’s fixation on their baby.

“A few days ago, my husband and I found the gender of the baby. The minute we told Will, he started calling the baby a random name he picked and was going to give to his baby if he wasn’t infertile. He then started begging us to use this name and my husband said it was a ‘done deal’.

“I refused but my husband called me heartless and asked me to do this one small, nice gesture for his struggling friend to give him closure and honour him after all the things he has done for us. I flipped and said it’s my baby not his. Will heard this and left immediately.

“My husband yelled at me saying it’s his baby too and my behavior towards Will was abhorrent. He left after him and didn’t come back til the morning. He kept saying the same thing and pressuring me to agree on the name but I refused.

“Am I The a**hole for choosing this hill to die on?”

Let us know what you think in the comments below!

  • That is a very strange thing for a friend to ask. Naming the baby is very personal. Maybe if he’s a very close friend, a middle name? But only if both parents agree.

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  • At the end of the day its your baby and you have the right to name him/her what you want. You should discuss this with your husband and come to some agreement. Maybe chat to Will about the outburst and apologies and let him know you’re grateful for all he’s done but the using the name he wants is just not what you want. You could use it as a second or third name or just not at all. Enjoy your pregnancy.

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  • The friend has over stepped his boundary here. Could be a nice middle name but ultimately up to the parents

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  • Although this may seem a small gesture for some, for others it isn’t. And it’s the question if this gesture would give this friend closure. It might be good for this friend to seek some counseling


    • I feel the husband and wife should discuss this in calm together, without the friend being around and it should be a shared decision. It’s sad this conflict comes now between their relationship

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  • I think she needs to sit down with Will, apologise for the out burst (to keep things good with his mate) but explain it is your baby and you are excited that you get to enjoy all this as a couple, that you’ve waited your whole life for this experience. If they truly like the name they might be able to add it as a middle name but it’s their choice.

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  • A definite No! Sorry but it’s your baby and you have a right to name your baby. If you want someone else to bake your baby you boy need to be in agreement and you ask them. A big fat NO!!!

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  • I don’t think hubby’s best friend should name the baby,. That should be yours and hubby’s choice of name. Best friend can always adopt a child.

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  • This isn’t a small gesture, honouring the best friend would be giving the baby the middle name of the best friend, letting him name the child might be going a bit far, I guess it all depends on how close the 3 of you all are. Personally I probably wouldn’t let my hubby’s best friend name our baby (probably because he would name it after himself hah)

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  • Totally creepy – if he wants to name a baby a specific name, then he adopts one himself. This baby belongs to you and your husband, therefore its your choice what to name it. Dont give in, your husband should be siding with you not his mate, thats also creepy! Stick to your guns!

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  • Husbands mate sounds like a deadset weirdo.

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  • Ok that is a bit wierd to me

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  • I don’t think that’s something the husband should be taking charge of. They should be naming THEIR child together.
    Will can always adopt a baby on his own and name it the name he wants.

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  • This is not a small gesture at all. It is an entirely unreasonable request and I’m on her side.

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  • Naming your baby is something that the parents should do, not some friend. If the mum-to-be gives in and allows the friend name the baby, it may just open up more problems, not just during the pregnancy but, also once the baby is born. I would stick to my guns, and refuse to name the baby what Will wants……What Will wants, is not what Will gets.

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