It would be a difficult situation for all I’m sure. As a nan myself, a bit older, I would be a bit shocked to see my grandson in a dress. And it’s not so much because of my discomfort, more so I’d be thinking of what would happen if his friends ever found out. It’s a fine line between personal expression and opening oneself up to a tirade of bullying. Sad but true

They did the right thing for sure! I would have done the exact same thing if my MIL had some that! So rude and judgmental. Poor kid

My kids played dress up all the time without prejudice. My girls loved dressing their brother up in their clothes and he loved that they cared and loved doing his hair etc. Roll play is very healthy. Good on you Mum and Dad supporting your son in every way. Love him always unconditionally. Grandma will realize her mistake and come around and love you all.

My grandchildren have a drawer here at our place full of dress up clothes & I’ve never disapproved of my grandsons wanting to wear fairy costumes or my granddaughters wearing Superman outfits. Let children be children! Grandparents roles are for giving them fun.

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  • • mom468034 replied
    • 22 Jan 2022 , 8:48 am

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  well said! Dress up is imaginative play, not gendered!

Your child’s mental health has to come first.

This was absolutely the right thing to do. I applaud this woman for advocating for her child 🙂

No one has the right to tell another how to parent. If the child is being upset then every right in the world to ask her to leave, however there will be other hurdles down the track that the youngster may have to deal with and this example may not be as good as the parents would wish.

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  • • Ellen replied
    • 24 Sep 2021 , 8:13 am

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  True, I agree with what you say

It seems to me that this mum and dad are just as judgemental as they claim ‘grandma’ is. That she had an opinion on her grandson wearing dresses shouldn’t have been an issue, picking on him though would have been another matter. Speaking to her first about how they want to parent is justifiable but if they are this think skinned then they are going to spend a lifetime deflecting and not managing issues that come along…..and there will be more issues (not just things about dresses!). Kicking her out hasn’t resolved the issue and has likely just caused a fracture in the family over something that could have discussed and conversed about – grandma doesn’t need to agree about everything you decide to do as parents, but you all need to respect each other. Children need their grandparents too….even if they are ‘old fashioned’ sometimes. Throwing out the voice of a prior generation because we think we have all the answers is foolish and immature. It’s interesting that the majority think it’s fine…how sad that most people would rather live with angst than resolution for the sake of being ‘right’.

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  • • Ordinary mum replied
    • 23 Sep 2021 , 2:07 pm

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  I think we do need to give the older generation time to get used to the changes that have happened so quickly. A missed opportunity by this mother to educate her mother in law.

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    • • mom478886 replied
      • 26 Sep 2021 , 3:26 pm

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    The grandmother was already spoken to by the father and chose to repeat the behaviour and intentionally tried to shame her grandson into wearing jeans. He deserves to be psychologically safe I. His own home and she did not provide that environment. The parents do not need to put up with the grandmother picking on their child.

Good on the parents for sticking up for their son!

If mum and dad both agreed on the move out please ..that’s fine with me.

childhood is a wonderful time to true experiment.

Good on you for standing up to your MIL and setting boundaries. There are not enough of those these days. He’s your son and it’s your job to protect him and make him feel safe. You did the right thing by your family and your son. I’m so glad your husband backed you up too. And the other family members have no right to be involved.

It’s tricky because I understand protecting your child. I also think that there is an opportunity to educate the mother in law and help her to understand why her attitude is harmful and unkind to their child. I hope the grandmother stops speaking badly about the woman and her family and learns from this. Too many children grow up scared to share who they really are because they are worried how others will respond to them

My son loved to wear dresses too and we always let him. One afternoon he and his friend were dressed up as girls and when I shared a picture with the mum of my son’s friend she asked please don’t share with my husband as he would get very mad. The older generation and people from a different culture may not appreciate this at all.
However these parents clearly indicated they’re fine with their son wearing dresses and grand parents should respect that. When they can’t I agree that they should leave

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  • • Ellen replied
    • 23 Sep 2021 , 7:59 am

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  Btw my son is 16yrs old now and is not gay. Last summer he wore a dress just for a bit of fun and I love it !

I’d kick her out too.

I think its great that the husband totally backed his wife. They are your children not hers and you can raise them as you like.

The parents did the right thing, good on them for addressing it quickly

Well done to these parents. I would’ve done the same. People can be so rude

I’m glad the parents kicked her out as i would have too.
It’s not her business to comment. I get that the older generation can be old school in their thinking but they should just keep it to themselves.

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  • • mom71495 replied
    • 23 Sep 2021 , 6:16 pm

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  To those who think that their parents and parents-in-law are old school in their thinking. Just wait until your children grow up and you may express your opinion on what their children are doing or saying. They just may say to you to mind your own business and declare that you are ‘Old School’ in your thinking. The actions these parents have taken have done nothing but cause a division within the family circle. If the parents support their child wearing dresses then that is their decision, it doesn’t necessarily mean that their son will grow up as a cross-dresser or be gay. Kids do like to experiment in playtime, I get that. Mine did also. Kicking her out was harsh. They could have used a different approach and handled the situation another way. Grandparents’ opinions and input are important to their grandchildren and it is a shame not to have that because there are many children in this world who have never had the opportunity of having a grandparent in their lives to love and to share life and their input with. Maybe coming together in a truce and having a discussion with her about the situation would help. I think their approach was harsh, especially from the son, because if he is like that, then what is his relationship to his mother like in the first instance? I believe it’s a matter of respect all around, for the lad, his parents, and the grandmother. Finding common ground would be the first step to healing.

I think it’s great she stood up for her son – who cares what kids wear! But I probably wouldn’t have asked her to leave so quickly. Sounds like it was an excuse to get rid of her.

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  • • Ordinary mum replied
    • 23 Sep 2021 , 2:08 pm

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  That was my first thought! Instead of taking the time and giving her MIL another opportunity it was “get out – you are no longer welcome”