I think she has lost sight of the whole marriage arrangement

they should both be able to spend what they like but consult the other before making any big purchases. If he is very money minded perhaps asking for a wage isn’t such a silly idea.

I think she should be able to spend whatever her husband does on non-essential items. The money should be shared, not hoarded by either. If he’s a very tight person money-wise though, it would be tricky for her to get what she wanted if she’s more splurgey. 5k is ridiculous though, unless he spends that on himself in a month.

$5000 is a pretty hefty price tag!

I don’t know wat ther budget is (though if she thinks having to consult when she spends over $217 on non-essentials is embarrassing, I’d guess it’s generous). But generally my inclination would be yeah, some money she doesn’t have to account for – but not that much.

I think this can harbour resentment. But she should be allowed to spend or have him offer to pay for things she needs as well

I don’t agree with this at all, and if that’s what she was going to want, then it should have been discussed prior to them having children!

Her husband may not even get that much salary. If the husband pays all the bills – mortgage, rates & taxes and maintenance including replacing expensive appliances; motor vehicles including their associated govt fees, maintenance and fuel, and food (I get the impression she may have “expensive choices) I doubt he would have much money left to be spent on luxuries anyway. She possibly has expensive taste in clothing too.

I think she is asking too much money, Nannies have to pay for their travelling cost, rentals, electricity bills and by taking care of someone else kids. In this case this lady doesn’t have to pay any of the bills as her husband is taking care of all this, she is taking care of her own kids at her home. She deserve to have money for her personal expenses from her husband but not a salary.

Some men truly just cannot grasp the mental load of motherhood, I couldn’t live like that with someone scrutinising my spending however i am the frugal one in the family so hubby has no need to, I say hell yes she should ask for a wage !

If my husband would pay all that money to me, there wouldn’t be any money left. Ha. Ha.
Strange indeed that one person needs that. It says a lot about their relationship.
I have free access to my husband’s salary and my husband wouldn’t want it any other way.

I think what they are doing already is fair enough? $216 is a pretty large amount for 1 income families. So I dunno, I think she’s asking too much for a salary lol we see the money my husband earns as both of ours. We just check with each other about large spending amounts first. And Centrelink payments are like paying me anyway, they are super generous!

I think the amount might be much but should this had not been discussed prior to them having children?
I know myself that my husband and I see income as both of ours not just his and hers. I’m a stay a home mum and he makes Enough for us to get by but he never says don’t spend or asking his permission to buy something. This is going to say that I usually only shop for groceries and essentials for the kids, but if I need new clothes or my hair looks scraggly he’s just tells me to spend what you want.

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  • • Ellen replied
    • 23 May 2019 , 7:33 am

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  Same by us. I’m a stay at home mum and my husband has his own business. We see his income as our money, not his money and share what comes in and get by.

Holy cow. $5000 a month! I’d love someone to pay me that for looking after my own kid!

We receive about $1600 per 4wks for 2 special need foster children, so yeah $5000 is a lot. Btw the $1600 we receive doesn’t go to me, it goes to our children and cost of running a household.

$5000 a month, oh my god that’s a lot of money! That’s $1250 a week, what non essentials could she possibly need that cost that much? Yeah, it’s tough when there’s only one income and hubby should maybe let you have control over some of the cash……but $1250 a week is way over the top

It really depends on your relationship i think. I know that my husband who earns about 3 times as much as me doesn’t bat an eyelid when i spend money. But with this woman, it sounds as though her husband is a bit miserly and is going to question everything that she spends on. This is no way for a woman to live and for some people, rightly or wrongly, having children can be a time in life when you do feel very beholden to others because you are not earning an income. But we do need to realise that it’s a really important thing that we are doing (having and raising children), and we shouldn’t feel as though the money coming into the house is not ‘our’ money. If asking for an income from her husband is going to help, then i say go for it.

She deserves some financial independence but that is a huge amount of money.