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At the risk of sounding severely judgmental (even though this is not my intention), I am still going to pose the question, because I’m genuinely curious about the ‘why’? Why are people so selfish?

WHY are people continuing to bring their ENTIRE family along with them to a doctor’s appointment when they’re specifically told that this is not permitted during the appointment booking process?

Don’t get me wrong, I know that especially with pregnancy-related appointments some partners love to feel included. And of course, it’s lovely to have one’s spouse witness everything…. except, did you forget about the pandemic?

Can We Blame It On Baby Brain?

Baby brain is a real thing, could that be what caused many expectant mothers to accidentally forget the receptionist’s request and still bring along their partner and children to crowd an already full waiting room and create a situation where there aren’t enough seats for patients to sit on?

Seating was already reduced to promote social distancing and then when you introduce all these unexpected visitors to a waiting room who weren’t counted on being there, you really are causing a potential hazard for all involved – including your very own children.

These patients already knew that their family members wouldn’t be accepted into the appointment and didn’t attempt to have them walk together with them into the doctor’s office, so why have family members loiter in the waiting room at all?

Rebellious or Selfish?

Is it the thrill of breaking the rules? Being a rebel? Because these people can’t pretend they didn’t know especially when they would have their spouse and children walk away every single time a staff member would approach them.

I don’t doubt that these families underwent the same tests and questionnaires to gain access to the clinic as everyone else did, but if you’re going to ignore requests not to bring your entire family to an appointment with you, what’s there to say that you aren’t the type of person to give your loved one paracetamol to conceal a high fever – rendering the mandatory temperature check at the door completely useless.

What is it about breaking these safety regulations that is simply so thrilling to some?

Why, Just WHY?

I do feel empathy for the parents without any support person to leave their little ones with so that they can attend these pregnancy appointments alone. However, if your spouse is right there with you and your children and they’re capable of walking out of the clinic upon request, but then pop right back in when you give them the ‘all clear’ over the phone, what exactly is the purpose of what you’re doing? What are you trying to accomplish?

It feels like we’re on the cusp of a second wave of COVID-19 and very few people are actually taking the whole thing seriously- which is probably the cause of so many new clusters in the community to begin with.

How is it that appointments are suddenly a family affair? It simply doesn’t make any sense especially when you are given prior warning of the new appointment policies and procedures at the time of making the booking – added to this you have staff members requesting partners and children please wait outside.

You Are To Blame!

Why are we making it so unnecessarily challenging to keep the pandemic under control. Is it really that hard for each of us to do our part and to be considerate of others. I believe it’s exceedingly selfish to put essential workers as well as other patients at risk just because some people think they are above the rules that everyone else abides by.

Juggling kids and appointments is tricky at the best of times. Now when you add the new COVID-19 practices to the mix you’re looking at making an already difficult task even more challenging.

Kids usually don’t want to be waiting patiently for their own doctor’s appointments- let alone for their parents appointments. I know even I find the whole process incredibly boring so it’s somewhat of a blessing to be asked NOT to bring one’s children along to their appointment.

Keeping Safe

Let’s not lose sight of why these sometimes inconvenient regulations have been put in place. It’s not to ruin our plans nor are they a personal attack- we all have to comply with the changes in order to keep one another safe.

Think about it this way, especially in terms of antenatal appointments – you’re about to become a mother (again or for the first time), this means being capable of putting someone else’s life above your own wants and needs. Why not take this as the perfect opportunity to start practicing this unbelievably demanding skill and begin thinking of others!

Have you encountered any incidents/experiences where people have been selfish and not abiding by the COVID-19 precautions? Tell us in the comments below.

  • I guess it was a really strange time.

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  • When I was pregnant with my second child and going to appointments I would often see other pregnant women trying to bring their partners in with them and getting turned away.
    I think some of them couldn’t speak English properly but their partners could so would use that as an excuse to have them there as an interpreter but still, you can make arrangements beforehand.

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  • I attend every one of my husbands appointments at the doctors and specialists with him, I am his full time carer, we have a 2 year old that comes too, so appointments are a family affair for us, my 2 year old was loud as 2 years old can get so I had to take her out of the last appointment while the doctor was on the phone, completing a review, then he had to get blood tests so we went to get all his medication and came back, I then had ultrasounds and blood tests to go too and medication to pick up, I don’t drive but at the ultrasound place they have the 1 person rule so I went in alone though would normally bring my family as my husband is not capable of safely watching my toddler. Now looking at him you can’t tell he’s a disabled pensioner that he’s on very strong medications that the discs in his spine and neck are bad. Not every disabled person is in a wheelchair, not every thing is black and white. There are families that have to go together places.

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  • Ive pretty much seen most pope doing the right thing

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  • Everyone is so different

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  • Just like the other article, Aldi special buys draw in the crowds. But also the Black Lives Matter protests that people are insisting on attending. Why and what will it achieve? Everyone knows it’s a big deal but marching in a crowd right now is not going to change the fact that we need to defeat this pandemic first.

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  • It’s difficult and unusual times and we need to look after each other by isolating as much as possible.

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  • I live in W.A and my children were allowed at the midwife appointments as they were deemed essential appointments and they know not everyone can find a babysitter (especially during a time of self isolation), but they were not allowed up in the hospital itself. Thankfully by the time bub came the other week, the restrictions were reduced enough. As much as my husband wanted to attend appointments he only made it to the ultrasounds prior to the pandemic.

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  • I think we’ve all got a little complacent and we really shouldn’t be. Now is the time we need to step up the social distancing and hygiene!
    Unless we need to go out/travel etc we should really be staying home

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  • People need to think twice what they are doing right now.We need to save essential workers in our health system.

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  • I’ve been shocked and amazed by people’s responses to Covid. It’s really shown people’s true colours in ways that have surprised me, or it has enhanced their selfish behaviour.

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  • I live in a small rural area but I still take my son for his appointments. Unless I’m needed I sit in the car to wait for him. At least then if I’m needed they only have to call me in. I understand what is being said in this article. It’s not that you are taking your children in, it’s that your partner and the children have come in for the appointment when they aren’t allowed further than the waiting room. That is when they should have either stayed at home or at least in the car.

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  • Unless you are directly affected, it is easy to see this virus as an abstract concept and one that doesn’t really apply to everyone. Unfortunately that’s just how it is 🙁

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  • I think this article is harsh. You never know someone’s situation at home. It might be safer to take the kids shopping with you than to leave them at home. Or maybe your spouse has a fly in fly out job so you have no one to take care of them.

    If you’re pregnant and your spouse comes with you somewhere – maybe you’re not able to drive due to pain/sciatica or whatever else it may be.

    You can’t say someone is being selfish if you don’t know their situation.

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  • Inn all honesty, why would you want the kids? They’re just going to be bored and bug you. Surely most people have someone who can babysit.

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  • Without knowing/understanding someone’s situation or their need to have kids tag along to doctors, shops, etc., it is hard to judge … but, if they are able to leave the kids with someone, then, yes, they need to leave them behind …..

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  • Lets practice a little empathy here and understand that we can’t know someone’s situation by looking in from the outside. How do you know that this mother doesn’t have complications that make it difficult or painful to get around? I had a pelvic girdle with my second and just standing up from a seated position caused teeth gritting pain. She may need monitoring for an unrelated condition like epilepsy or suffer from a form of mental illness and need the support. Maybe her kids are still breastfed, the list could go on and on.
    I do agree that we all need to do our part and be more mindful of each other but try not to judge others outright. Remember you don’t know their situation.

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  • Not everyone has someone who can watch kids while you attend a Doctors appointment. At the Doctors, how do you know the appointment isn’t for a child?
    Even when I was pregnant with baby 2 (2 years ago) I had to take my eldest to all appointments because I don’t have friends or family to care for her and hubby was working. She didn’t have daycare and wasn’t school age.
    In some cases, absolutely, if you can, only the person needing the appointment should be there, but I also understand if an exclusively breastfed baby attends with Mum. Some babies just will not take a bottle and I know a 15 minute appointment at 8am, it’s not unusual to be waiting until 11am.
    You don’t know the circumstances and shouldn’t judge.
    COVID sucks and has made life difficult, but it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t lose all consideration of others.

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  • I agree, certainly when there is a husband or someone else who can look after the kids it’s definitely not very considerate. I have standard 4 therapist appointments every week, add gp hospital and specialist appointments and you can understand it’s juggling. However I succeed to choose time slots and suitable moments so I only have to take the child where the appointment is for. I have no family or close friends around who can support me in this.

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  • I never leave the house with my kids unless it is to go for a walk or to go to my parents house. I was pregnant during the pandemic and I never once took my partner or my daughter with me. I rescheduled my appointments for when I could have my daughter babysat, which I know not everyone has the luxury of doing.

    I won’t even go to the supermarkets with my kids.


    • Seems you do the right thing Jess !

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