The day of my sons diagnosis I changed forever as a person. A part of my heart will be forever broken. The day before he was diagnosed I was sitting back at my sisters watching our kids play completely oblivious to the horror that I was about to face as a mother. They had done an xray on his chest because of sleeping problems. With the results they walked me into a little room with Koby. They had found a large mass in his chest and I was being flown to Brisbane on the next available flight to see an Oncology specialist. I didn’t even know what oncology meant until I rang my mum and she said Cancer. I rang my husband who was about to board a flight home. I told him not to board I would be down soon and explained. I sat in the room with my son waiting just crying in shock. I remember the sick feeling washing over me just waiting for them to say this wasn’t serious. They didn’t
We sat in emergency in Brisbane waiting for the oncology team to meet us. After a brief meeting they wheeled myself in a wheelchair with my son on my lap to the ward my husband walking beside us. I held it together until we got to the the room. The tears started uncontrollably. The next two weeks was a blur of scans MRI, bone marrow testing, bloods. My emotional block went up and we worked out a treatment plan. My focus was wholey on doing anything to get my son better. A little child of 13 months with tubes running everywhere .Chemotherapy started. We had two and a half rounds of chemo. Each round consistenting of 3 different drugs administed over 3 days 3 weeks apart. I hope you are all lucky enough to never experience the strength of the children on the pediatric oncology floor fighting an unfair battle thrust upon them. They are beautiful, resilient and put up the fight of their life time with smiles on their faces.
After a big surgery to remove the tumour that had only shrunk slightly from Chemo we got the beautiful news our handsome Koby was in remission. I love watching him grow as a STRONGLY independent cheeky child. Even when he is driving me crazy I look at him and think of the battle he fought that he doesn’t remember. When we arrived home my emotional block come down and my personal battle started of coming to terms with what my child had faced.
The day my child was diagnosed a piece of my heart was forever broken. The sadness I have seen. The children that were taken to soon. Never again will a virus just feel like a virus. Hurting legs legs just be growing pains. The worry soon and easily surfaces. The sadness is always at the back of my mind. It has changed me from a worry free person to a forever worried parent. I just sit sometimes when I am by myself thinking with tears rolling down my cheeks. A year and a half in remission and the memories still hurt like hell. It is getting easier each 3 months that Koby’s scans come back clear. We are so blessed to have this little trooper in our lives and he has taught us what happiness truly is.
Posted by mom181606, 20th January 2017