In most cases, as parents, we’re on board with teachers handing out punishments for misbehaviour in class. But this dad is refusing to accept his son’s after-school detention, and he’s now unsure if he’s done the right thing.
The dad explained that his son George, who turns 13 this month, does really well in school and gets good grades. While he does struggle socially and has been bullied in the past, the situation has improved, even though he’s not a popular kid.
Last week, George was due to present a project he’d been working on, but things didn’t go to plan.
“He had to create a children’s toy and give a sales pitch to the class,” George’s dad said.
“Last Friday was the presentation day, and George was really excited. He’d put a lot of effort into his toy and the presentation.
“But I got a notification saying George had been given an after-school detention, something he’s never received before. As he’d refused to participate in class and didn’t do his presentation. When I picked him up, I could tell immediately that he was upset.
“I asked him what happened and why he didn’t do the presentation. He said he didn’t refuse the presentation; when it was his turn, he asked to go later. His teacher said no, and that he had to do it then or get a detention. George said he, ‘Couldn’t do it now,’ but didn’t explain further when asked, so he was given the detention.”
The dad says he kept pressing George, worried he was being bullied again.
“Eventually, he told me the real reason: he had a random erection just before his turn and, no matter what, it ‘wouldn’t go down’.
“With that info, I think George’s request was perfectly reasonable. He didn’t refuse to do the presentation—he simply asked to do it a little later. Obviously, he didn’t want to explain the reason in front of the whole class when the teacher asked him.”
However, the dad says his ex, George’s mum, was angry at their son for getting a detention.
“I explained what happened and said I didn’t think George was wrong. I said I’m not supporting the detention and would pick him up at the normal time.”
“When I told his mum what happened, she looked disgusted and said something like, “Why did he even have one in class to begin with?” I explained that random erections happen, especially in early puberty, and they don’t always relate to sexual thoughts, which is what she was assuming. She replied, “Well, I’m not sure that’s true,” dismissing what I said. So I told her, “You might not be sure, but I am.”
“She insisted we needed to present a united front, along with the school, and that by going against her, I was sending George the wrong message. I asked why her way of handling it was automatically right and why I should be the one to concede. It escalated into a big argument, which we haven’t had in years.
“She’s saying she is going to punish him for refusing when it’s her week with him next week and that I am being an a**hole for “going against her”. Her mother (my ex-mother-in-law) text me saying I was setting a bad example for George by letting him get away with being disrespectful to his teacher. Which he wasn’t even, just asked to do his presentation later. I respectfully told her she should mind her own business, and that George was my son.”
The dad says he’s now worrying if he’s done the right thing, and needs some ‘outside perspectives’.
So what’s your take on the situation? Let us know in the comments below.
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