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A new study says that banter and poking fun at your partner can increase relationship satisfaction and longevity.

We all know that having a good sense of humour is one of the most sought after traits when looking for a potential partner, but it turns out banter could be more important than first thought. Researchers from Appalachian State University found that couples who can roast each other have the happiest relationships – so long as they don’t take the banter too far!

All About Compatibility

Professor Geoffrey Hall from the University of Kansas reviewed the findings of the study, saying that they highlighted the importance of humour in sustaining romantic relationships. Professor Hall was quick to point out that the ‘humour’ the study refers to is not how funny the individuals in a relationship are independently of one another, but rather the humour they create together – basically, inside jokes and banter are key to a healthy relationship! “Say you and your partner share a quirky sense of humour, but romantic comedies or sit-coms do nothing for either of you,” Professor Hall said. “It’s not that any style or a sense of humour is any better or worse. What matters is that you both see quirky humour as hysterical. If you share a sense of what’s funny, it affirms you and affirms your relationship through laughter.”

What You Love Most

The study showed that it’s important for couples to be able to have a laugh at each others’ expense, without either person getting offended by the banter. “If you think your partner tells mean-spirited jokes, then it’s likely that you’ve seen that first-hand in your relationship,” Professor Hall said.

So if you think that Blake and Ryan have the perfect marriage, or John and Chrissy are couple goals, this study may have uncovered their secret!

Do you and your partner have a compatible sense of humour or share banter? Let us know in the comments!

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  • In other words marry someone who has a sense of humor and can laugh at them selves.

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  • Yes after 10 years we still do this

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  • I think that is true as my ex and I had very different ideas and sense of humor

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  • We have over the years enjoyed a lot of banter, but lately, hubby has been getting a hard time at work which has resulted in not much communication between us at all. He pretty much comes home and sits himself in front of the tv. I just don’t know what to do about it

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  • Haha yep hubby and I always do -the girls love to chip in and make a joke or laugh at me too. We love & have alot of banter in our family. Life would be so boring without it.

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  • Ooh yes!! Only last night we were sitting on the couch laughing and taking the ‘p…’ out of each other. It’s something our young adult son sees too as being a positive and he involved himself too.

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  • We often have lots of laughs with and at each other and I’m sure our sense of humour has kept us together sometimes through thick and thin. But we still have a good giggle even after 35 years.

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  • Banter is important when maintaining a connection for sure.

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  • Banter can be fun as long as it’s not hurtful.

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  • Interesting but I wonder if it’s true for everyone.

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  • Depends on the quality of his jokes! We generally do have the same sense of humour

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  • My partner and I are always joking with each other, we know not to take it too far. Always great to make each other laugh!

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  • My husband is very funny too. And he loves it when I make fun of him! :-)

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  • Banter and laughter are a must!

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  • Yep, one of the reasons I fell in love with my hub was because I found him hilarious !

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  • I love a good laugh with my partner…

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  • Ignore you can’t laugh together I don’t see the point, but everyone is different

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  • Yes, you need to be able to have a laugh together

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  • I feel that is importanr for longterm success


    • Laughter and fun is definitely important – releases feel good endorphins.

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  • We definitely have a compatible sense of humour. I don’t mean to be funny but hubby thinks I’m naturally hilarious. As for him, he has that English sense of humour (just like an English comedy). We definitely bounce off each other.

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