I was reflecting on those first precious few weeks of new baby the other day with a friend. I remembered how I felt on top of the world to be walking with my new baby and toddler to the shops. This was a monumental achievement in the first few weeks of having two kids under the age of 2. I remember the local community actively noticed that my bump was now a baby in a carrier or stroller. Having said that one person asked me if I have actually had the baby – at which point I looked down at my ‘wobbly’ bump in utter disbelief!
A lot of people asked after our Little Lady and how she was doing, often followed up with – is she a good baby? Mmmmm, Let me think about that.
I struggle with this description as the opposite to Good is….Bad. So was she a good baby? Yes – because if she wasn’t I would be saying she was a bad baby – which of course she wasn’t! I also remember not wanting to jinx myself!
So I started using other words to describe newborn behaviour:
- Amazing
- Great
- Fabulous
- Challenging
- Tiring
- the list goes on…
I think what people are really trying to ask is:
- Does she sleep well
- Is she feeding
- Are you sleeping
- Is she settled
- Does she cry a lot
- the list goes on….
And of course she did all of these things…Sometimes she was unsettled, other times she gifted us an 8 hour sleep overnight. Sometimes she wanted to be cuddled and not go back in her bassinet (grrr) – other times she was so flaked out she has no idea she spent the morning at a cafe, beach and in the car!
So for me, the ‘Good ‘v’ Bad baby’ is language I prefer not to use.
Don’t get me wrong I do not correct people, I just choose to broaden the adjectives and use more positive language!
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