A woman has been labelled ‘selfish’ after revealing her plan to have a child with her gay best friend and share custody, raising the child in separate homes.

The woman took to an online forum where she asked for advice and tough love, as she detailed her plan to become a mum.

“I’m in my mid-30s, single, and have always wanted to be a mum,” she said.

“My best friend (let’s call him J) is gay, also single, and has always wanted to be a dad. We’ve been friends since uni, practically family at this point, and recently we started seriously discussing co-parenting.

“We’re both financially stable, live in the same city, and have very similar parenting values. We’d do 50/50 custody, raise the baby together but in separate homes, and aim for a really amicable, supportive co-parenting relationship. We wouldn’t be romantically involved (obviously), but we’re incredibly close, trust each other completely, and neither of us wants to wait around hoping to meet ‘the one’ just to start a family.”

The woman asked if she was being naïve thinking this form of parenting could work.

“Has anyone done this? Any co-parenting experiences, good or bad? Also, any practical/legal considerations I should be thinking about?”

She was met with a mixed response. One mum told her she needed to ‘be less selfish’ because 50/50 custody is ‘sh*t’ for a child.

Another wrote, “I think it’s hard for children to have two different homes. I know that in lots of families this can’t be helped, but to put a child in this position on purpose isn’t ideal.”

While others were concerned at how a new mum would cope being away from her baby. But some mums supported the idea.

“I think this kind of planned parenting could work really well because you can start from a point of talking about how you each think co-parenting will work, who will do what, what boundaries you want to enforce, there’s opportunity to discuss how you want to approach every detail.”

What’s your opinion? Let us know in the comments below.