Mum Devastated Over Husband's Reaction To Third Pregnancy

The mum-to-be was left gutted when her husband was less than excited about the announcement of her third pregnancy.

A mum, who just found out about her third pregnancy, has taken to parenting forum Mumsnet to share her disappointment about her husband’s reaction to her baby announcement. After having her contraceptive coil taken out in October, the mum says that they had discussed trying for another baby and were in no rush, but nature had other ideas…

Too Much To Handle

The mum says that she had been having conversations with her husband about the possibility of another child for a while. “We decided we would try for another baby, we were in no rush so just decided to see how it went,” she said. “We’ve spoken about it a few times in the last few months, all positive stuff, just general chat, even spoken about it to his mum and sister, he even told them he would like a girl.”

Everything indicated they were on the same page, but the mum said that when she texted her husband to say she was pregnant a little sooner than expected, his response came as a shock.

“What are you going to do?” he said, going on to ask if they should keep the baby.

Really Upsetting

After receiving the text, the mum says she was in total shock. “I told him I thought he was being selfish and horrible and asked why he agreed to me having the coil out if he didn’t want me to get pregnant,” she wrote. “Now maybe this is me being really oversensitive, but it has really upset me…I feel so deflated and just not excited at all now.”

Fellow mums commenting on the post were equally gobsmacked. “He sounds like he’s changed his mind and not told you. That’s really unfair,” said one outraged mum. Others suggested that the mum’s decision to text her husband the news could be part of the problem. “Maybe you just caught him at a really bad time?” said one.

We really hope this couple is able to work things out – this husband needs a lesson or two in how to communicate!

Did you experience a bad reaction to your pregnancy announcement? Share your stories in the comments.

62 Comments

- - meedee said
  - 21 Feb 2023
    2:20 pm
Sounds like a massive communication breakdown

- - mum300445 said
  - 30 Sep 2021
    2:24 pm
Would be so upsetting… he can’t help his reaction but it’s a shame he couldn’t pretend to be excited. Takes the shine off the whole pregnancy.

- - Frankiielot said
  - 05 Sep 2021
    10:48 pm
Sad he reacted this way as some couples try for years and years and can’t get pregnant so it’s a blessing in disguise!
Hopefully they worked it all out and are happy with the decision they made.

- - Jess said
  - 31 Jul 2020
    8:05 pm
Our first was a huge shock… I got off the phone and walked down the stairs and I was white as a ghost, my partner asked me if I was ok. I told him to sit down then I said “I’m fu*%ing pregnant” i was just so shocked and then scared of his reaction because we hadn’t been together long

- - mom462794 said
  - 12 May 2020
    11:31 pm
Maybe a text message wasn’t the best way to deliver the news? Hope they worked it out.

- - rnash02 said
  - 14 Apr 2020
    8:28 pm
Our 1st was a shock but both very happy

- - mom160289 said
  - 03 Apr 2020
    9:21 pm
Thankfully haven’t been in this situation. Hope they worked it out

- - DaffyD said
  - 31 Mar 2020
    12:16 pm
My ex freaked out when I got pregnant with number 2 and demanded I have a termination . I refused he left

- - nealsq said
  - 24 Mar 2020
    10:43 pm
I would probably be a bit peeved too but we don’t know the whole story here only her side

- - JungleHeatMama said
  - 18 Mar 2020
    9:35 pm
Gosh, he can have a moment can’t he? Women can have any reaction and it’s ok, if a man does he is judged harshly. Give him time, and live not abuse

- - ThisIsMe said
  - 02 Mar 2020
    2:19 pm
Sad that he reacted that way but I don’t believe she should have sent a text. This is something you do in person or over the phone if you can’t contain your excitement and have been actively trying

- - Blossom said
  - 01 Mar 2020
    9:10 pm
Why did she tell him by text??? He was probably annoyed and sent that message without thinking about it too much. In my personal opinion surely she could have waited until he got home.
His reaction was thoughtless but maybe they hadn’t planned to have another baby yet.
Not all get pregnant that soon after having a coil or other internal contraception removed.I know two women – one got pregnant either with an IUD not removed and and had a baby girl, another who had a tubal ligation and the gyno used clips. He did not cut and tie her tubes as she requested. As a result she also had a baby girl. She didn’t want to have another baby because of medical problems but she could not bring herself to abort and neither did the Dad want her to.

- - BellaB said
  - 01 Mar 2020
    7:14 pm
Very sad that he reacted that way; a really serious talk is needed.

- - mom385887 said
  - 01 Mar 2020
    5:30 pm
Regardless of how she told him, his reaction doesn’t sound like he really wanted the baby, changed his mind, or just liked the idea of having one without really thinking it through. Either way, he should have been honest with his wife instead of bull****ting her.

- - mom325275 said
  - 29 Feb 2020
    8:26 pm
How sad to be not excited about it

- - rovermum said
  - 29 Feb 2020
    5:11 pm
We were desperate to fall pregnant so very happy here (after 4 years!!) This sounds a little tricky, considering they were discussing it. Some honest discussions required I think.

- - tessie said
  - 29 Feb 2020
    12:57 pm
I think she did the wrong thing by texting him the news but he also replied in the wrong way. Maybe they should have both been with each other and she may have gotten a different response. I’m hoping they work this out because this child deserves to be loved too.

- - Ellen said
  - 29 Feb 2020
    8:58 am
I have a friend who wanted a 2nd child herself but her husband didn’t, then she skipped the pill behind his back and got pregnant. He really was upset and rightly so. But then once the 2nd child was there he was and is totally in love with the 2 of them. Being on the same line and honestly is so important. I think the fact that this lady shared the news via a text message is not a good thing.

- - mom101628 said
  - 29 Feb 2020
    12:17 am
Maybe she also needs a lesson or two on how to communicate. No way would I text my partner this message – I would want to see him face to face when I told him the great good news.
- Ellen replied
  
  29 Feb 2020 , 5:02 am
  Yes this goes beyond my understanding too !
- - mom160421 said
  - 28 Feb 2020
    11:03 pm
Her husband’s reaction would be so unexpected. I hope they are okay.