Co-parenting can be a minefield at the best of times, but once new relationships are thrown into the mix, it adds another layer of complexity. And this mum says her ex’s new relationship has left her fuming.
The mum says she had her suspicions her ex was seeing somebody, when she went to pick up her two-year-old son from her ex’s house last week.
“When I was leaving I was handed shoes that were not mine,” she explained.
“Seemed calculated as they weren’t by the door when I arrived. I got my shoes and left with my son.”
She thought it may be her ex’s way of subtly letting her know he has a new partner, so the mum decided to raise the subject of relationships with him.
“I called my ex to go over some things and brought up us seeing other people so we could be on the same page. That if one of us is seeing someone and it is getting serious we can let the other know to discuss, make intros, etc. He agreed. Not a crazy ask.”
This past weekend the mum had her son on Friday night, and his dad picked him up on Saturday morning.
That’s when things took a turn.
“I let my ex know our son is up and I can have him ready by the time he arrives. My son asks for food so I start making him some and shortly after there’s a knock. I ask if my ex if he wants pancakes (he’s been unemployed all year and sometimes I offer him food), he says he’s fine so I told him I’ll make them real quick.
“He is rushy and fidgety so I tell him the clothes are on the sofa to dress him. Kid starts a FIT which according to him is routine when getting dressed. He asks if he does that with me and I tell him no. I stop to talk to kid and calm him, finish the pancakes and give the container to his dad.
“Kid is still upset so I told them I could walk them down (to the car) since I have to take the dog out. My dog does his biz, I kiss my son bye and start back to my apartment. I glance around and see movement in the car so I bust a u-turn.
“There is a woman sitting in the car. I look at my ex and ask if he’s serious and with a dumb face he says what? I grab my son out of his car seat and take him back. He follows and we argue.”
The mum says she thought she had made it clear in their recent discussion that they would speak to each other before their son meets any new partners.
“My ex said he knew I would not react positively so he decided to just do what he wanted. I expressed my issue was not what he was doing but how he just did it. I don’t know this person and from what he says he probably doesn’t know her well either. I do not feel comfortable having someone introduced to my child at this stage and being around him. We still co-sleep with our child so where is this person sleeping? He left upset and I kept my son for the day.
“He was trying to gaslight me into thinking that my request is bonkers.”
The mum says she did go and apologise to her ex’s new partner, but it hasn’t made her feel any better.
“What happened was not her fault and let her know I wasn’t mad with her. She seemed fine and assured me she didn’t know and that’s it’s super casual and sporadic and she didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. On his end he says it’s his girlfriend and I’m keeping him from having a family and happiness.
“We quit counselling in May and he has been seeing her since May. She seems nice enough but I do not know her and do not trust just anyone around my child.”
Now she wants to know if she was in the wrong for not allowing her ex to have his son after discovering he had a new girlfriend. Share you opinion in the comments below.
We may get commissions for purchases made using links in this post. Learn more.
11:57 am
12:36 pm
6:25 am
1:21 pm
1:38 pm
12:30 pm
12:21 pm
11:22 am
3:49 am
8:32 pm
7:03 pm
11:51 am
5:07 am
6:21 pm
3:06 pm
11:08 am
8:22 am
7:51 am
7:40 am
11:43 pm
To post a review/comment please join us or login so we can allocate your points.