I am at a point and i dont know how to deal with this situation and family and friends are unable to help at this point. My ASD/ADHD Daughter has to always be in control and lead, she cant handle life or situations (even playing with friends) if this isnt the case. So My youngest daughter went to a friends for a playdate and my ASD/ADHD totally flippped, biggest meltdown as she wanted to stay and play with her friend.. altho she is older and they dont know her or the parents really.. Was so embarrassing as this poor mum was looking at me going WTF is happening, She wouldnt get into the car and went into a major meltdown… she dont understand its not the way it goes =( and says why dont I have playdates…. Not many want to come over as she can be aggressive, violent and totally controlling… she goes through cycle of friends… when they have reached their limit, they will quietly and nicely stay away, in a few weeks./months they will be back for as long as they can handle her!!! They have all told me they like her, she can just be hard to be friends with at times… I guess this is something she will learn to control and work out…. its just hard to see her along side her little sister and see how different their social lives are.x

Posted by miss_sammy, 26th October 2014

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  • I can only imagine how hard it is, and you sound like you handle everything so well! You should be proud of yourself, and thanks for sharing.


  • I feel for you. There are groups set up to help with children just like your child. Perhaps make contact with them and see how other parents cope with situations which you have described here.


  • Kids with disabilities push us to our limits and know what buttons to push, they make you feel so embarrassed when Thai happens is public but don’t judge yourself your doing a great job I have children with disabilities and kneo how they can be at times just keep chin high and be a proud mummy


  • I used to do a lot of work with kids who has ASD, and social skills was a big learning curve for all of them – your daughter is not alone.
    Is there a social skills group nearby? Perhaps your caseworker/local special school/community health centre knows of one? This is a group where kids with ASD can meet with a teacher to learn social skills – everything from how to have a conversation to how to deal with conflict – sounds like your daughter could benefit, especially since she has noticed there is a problem


  • Like the others have said i would be going to see your gp and talking about it with them.
    I love this place were we can all come and ask questions and you never feel as tho your being judged well done everyone.

    • I agree, I just love this place, it has helped me soooo much!…. Have an app with our Pead, and he hopefuly can get us onto the right track x THANKYOU


  • Thankyou all for your comments, means so much to open up and not be judged.. We have a LAC (Local Area Coordinater) and having help with the Behavioural Support Team also..We have come toooo far, but socially is where she lacks the most and she is VERY literal. For an example.. both my girls were at their nans yesterday and went into the pool, when they got out they both got towls from the cupboard which after use they always hang. But my said “when you have finished with the towls put them back where you got them from”so my youngest, was but nan they wet and hung it in the bathroom, Miranda didnt, she folded it up exactly how she got it and put it back into the cupboard. and couldnt understand how this not what she should of done! But we get there.. its a long road…


  • I agree & think its time to speak to GP or behavioural therapist. Its an awful situation for all of you to be in.


  • Would be hard to deal with, have you spoken to a professional health person, there may be a local therapist , or support group who can help you ,and your daughter ,


  • Sorry it’s so hard for you at the moment. Sad for your daughter that she doesn’t get any playdates – but totally understand why the others would want to stay away. I hope you can work thorugh it with her. It’s so hard isn’t it.


  • I understand this, as I have a son with a disability and one without, and the comparisons make me sad sometimes. Could a good behavioural therapist help her moderate herself a little?

    • Yes its so sad when you can see the difference <3 Teenage years worry me, as I dont want her to be bullied or her younger sister flourish ahead of her xxx thankyou for your kind words x


  • As a mother that would be so hard and overwhelming with different emotions
    I would find some calming things to do with her and hopefully it helps
    Maybe speak to her doctor
    Good luck


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