My Australian partner and I planned to marry in December 2012, then in january we planned to get my permanent residency (we waited so that we could do it as mr and mrs :) But one month before our little girl’s 2nd birthday and 2 months before our wedding Marty died of a sudden massive heart attack It was a shock like I’ve never felt before and I didn’t think life could get any worse, well it did – since losing Marty, the government’s policy for ‘only surviving parents’ has made life hell for me and my 6 children(3 are now adults but have lived here since they were children).

It’s felt like we’ve been told we no longer want you here, even though my child is Australian and the Australian I planned to marry just died. We were ineligible for most loans or support, I was forced to sell everything we owned just to put food on the table and start job hunting within a month of Marty dying. They’ve told me will take 15 years or $49,500 to process my application for ‘only surviving parent’ visa, the only way we could stay in Australia. It’s the only chance I can see for me to find work and provide for my kids is with that permanent residency visa – it’s been impossible so far. They’ve put my on $600/fortnight support but that’s with 3 children and we can barely afford food and rent each week.Losing Marty, everything we owned, the life I dreamt of and now this – it’s a kick in the guts. Why punish my family further by making it impossible for us to stay in the country where I feel close to Marty and my daughter’s country of birth? It seems so cruel and unfair.Marty was Australian, our daughter is Australian, the government should not punish an Australian child because their Australian parent died.

It is now 2015 and i have continued to fight to belong here. until now. Recently i recieved an email which states that they do not know my personal circumstances which is untrue, it has been told to them many times. they refuse to review my case in detail until i hand over either the $49500 for a 2 year processing time or the $4500 fee for a 30 year wait(yes it is now 30 years) but the punishment doesnt stop there, IF i go the only way i can afford which is $4500 and wait 30 years, they will put me on a different visa which takes away my healthcare card/medicare card and the small amount of family assistance i receive now making it impossible to stay, i can stay here and work but ill never be ‘an aussie’ so now the hard task of ‘going back to where i come from’, sadly for our daughter its a case of get out of the country of your birth i now have to try to get together enough money for passports and plane fare back to the UK. i will miss australia ill miss what it meant to marty but most of all im sad, i dont hate australia, i just feel there needs to be some kind of process that looks at cases individually. I am now 51 years old, our little girl will be 5 this year as a family we are strong, we will all survive this, right now my focus is on getting us home, getting us back to where we can finally breath again and where i can, at last, after the loss of my sweetheart, finally begin to grieve. what scares me the most is that i wont be able to raise the funds i need to return home , i worry what will happen to my children, i wonder how any of us will feel stranded in a place that the government has made it so clear, we dont belong in

Posted by 8lilfrogs, 25th April 2015

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  • Oh god what a trauma. I hope you now find yourself in a better situation


  • That is so sad. I’m so sorry to read this. It seems so unfair and cruel. Yes, some things here can do with a shake up. I just feel so bad, I am nearly crying :,(


  • How horrible having to deal with this on top of losing your love one.


  • So sorry about your loss and the stress that you have been under since then. Hoping that all goes well in the UK.


  • Such a sad story! I’m sorry that you are not getting the help you deserve. This decision was forced on you and that’s not really fair after all your years spent in Australia.
    I wish you all the best back in the UK. And that life will soon start to shine on you again.
    So sorry about loosing your partner. :-(


  • this is a copy of the email received from immigration


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