As we laboured in the pool waiting for the epidural team to come I dozed on and off as poor Andrew struggled to keep my head above the water. That was when he found it the most scary, as I just wasn’t with it anymore. I, on the other hand was imagining myself a wave, drifting in and out from the shore to our music playing softly in the background. Such a shame I couldn’t articulate anything by that stage.

The epidural came around 10am with a relief I cannot put into words. I had been so scared of the catheter, not being able to feel the contractions, and of course the big needle in my back. I shed a tear for the ‘natural’ birth I had dreamed of as more tubes and cords were hooked up, but I was so thankful to finally be back in the real world and be present in mind and body.

The next few hours Andrew and I got some much needed sleep while my contractions did their own thing. I could still feel them coming and going, and was enjoying being a part of the experience without too much pain!

By 2.30 on Saturday afternoon an examination thankfully revealed I was now fully dilated. An hour later, the baby had been moving down itself, and it was my turn to push. I was aware of the contractions so could push when needed, and actually enjoyed feeling like I could finally do something. To the amazement of the others in the room, I think I even called it ‘fun’!

Again, I felt like I was doing so well, but my baby obviously had other ideas. He wasn’t descending any further and had turned posterior, so the doctor was called for a ventouse delivery. My one piece of luck was that surgery was busy, so the procedure would have to be done in the delivery suite. If possible, I still wanted my baby to come out into this nice relaxed environment, not the bright lights of surgery. There was also less chance of resorting to caesarean. With a couple of vigorous pulls, my baby boy was lifted out to meet the world at 5.30pm, nearly 20 hours after my first waters broke. The epidural was light enough that I really felt that last stretch as his head emerged. With my baby boy on my chest, there was no more pain to be felt. The doctor fixed up a couple of stitches down there, but I was oblivious to it all with the best pain killer in the world – those two big eyes looking up at me for the first time. The birth of a new life, and a new mum.

Posted by msmalteaza, 2nd August 2013

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