You’re in a difficult situation. I think you should just drop the number at the end or use the name as a middle name.

It should be a name both of you like not just one of you put John as his second name

I was named after my mother and it did cause a little confusion before I married and changed my surname. I agree with others on this topic and would call him the same name as the husband but leave out the numbers, which sound really pompous.

what about using the names but not having the number

Yes it seems a nice idea but I personally used my mothers first name as the second name for my daughter and my second daughter used my husbands mothers second name

My late husband was named after his Dad who was named after his Dad. You don’t have to add a number after it though. The thing is you made a promise and no matter how long down the track it is, it’s a promise you should keep.

I really dislike a child carrying a name of their parent. They need their own identity.

I think naming your child should be agreed upon both parents not from years in advance. When you’re expecting brainstorm with your other half and eventually you should find a name that both will like. No one will disappoint each other both will have a say and share their opinions.

You agreed to this even before you were married and have been able to name two girls on your own so, please at least give him this.

I can see both sides to this but it obviously means a great deal to the dad and she did agree to it.

I think after reading the whole story she’s being unreasonable. She has basically gotten to name their 2 daughters and she made an agreement. If she didn’t like the idea she should have been up front and discussed other ideas like John as the middle name. I personally don’t like the idea of a name as bland as John Smith IV. But she agreed! This is important to her hubby, so it’s not fair on her part.

Agreeing to anything before you have kids is always different. What if he is just John and no IV?
I think saddling the wife with these traditions is usually unfair

Having originally agreed to it and never having brought up that you had waned on the idea over the past years, then I can understand how betrayed he would feel. It will take a lot of diplomacy to get yourselves back on track together from here, but it is something that should be done and soon. Then think of baby naming.

I think you both need to relax a little. It sounds super important to the Dad, so maybe disappointing him on the name change now is really unfair.

Definitely not wrong at all

Can you suggest John IV as the middle name instead.
I think that women go through all the inconvenience and pain of child birth so WE should be able to name our chlldren!

I feel like you did agree to it, and can’t really backflip on him now. Can you compromise somehow?

They need to communicate more and think about having a healthy child instead of bickering over a name. More important things in life to be honest.

He clearly told you how he felt and how important it was to him before you got married. You married him knowing this and you were ok with it.
Its very wrong to backflip now. If I was your partner i would be really angry and very disappointed

This is tricky and I can really see it from both points of view. I agree with a previous comment and would see if hubby would be open to giving baby a different first name and using John as a middle name. If baby grows up and decides he’d like to be known as John Smith IV he can.