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Article ‘My Sister-In-Law Wants To Name Her Baby In Memory Of Her Miscarriages’

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Telling a family member you don’t agree with the name they’ve chosen for their baby is fraught with danger – as this woman has discovered.

The 28-year-old took to a forum to explain why she doesn’t agree with the baby name her sister-in-law has chosen, and ask whether she did the wrong thing by voicing her opinion.

“I have 35-year-old sister-in-law, Ana. She is eight months pregnant,” she explained. “She has had three miscarriages in the past and had to have an abortion after her last pregnancy was not viable.

“Her pregnancy is taking a huge toll on her, she had awful morning sickness and pre existing medicinal conditions that have worsened and she is on sick leave.”

To help out, she offered to plan a baby shower for her sister-in-law, and hosted the event as it was mainly family and friends.

“The baby shower was a hit, Ana was really pleased with how everything turned out and at the shower told everyone that she is keeping the gender of her baby a surprise, but her and my brother-in-law picked out a name for the baby. They want to name the baby Five, as that the number is the amount of years they have tried to conceive and it took them three miscarriages and one termination.

“Ana said it’s a reminder of her baby’s older siblings, and I expressed in private after she asked what I thought of the name that it might not be this symbolic for their baby when they grow up to understand the meaning, I did say the word burden which led to Ana getting really upset and left, and my brother-in-law followed her out.”

She says her brother-in-law later called and told her she upset her sister-in-law and ruined her baby shower.

“My husband agrees with me on the name Five, but he thinks it wasn’t our place to say anything and that Ana and his brother had been through a lot of infertility struggles and that I should just let her have the name as there are worse names she could have picked.

“Five is a unique name but I was just trying to point out the meaning of the name they had picked, and the implications of it.”

Did she do the wrong thing voicing her opinion? And what do you think of the name? Let us know in the comments below. 

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Comments

  • Timing is really important for conversations like this. After a baby shower isn’t the time. However, if I were given that name I’d appreciate someone trying to point out how it may not work before it was bestowed.

    Reply

  • She has been through enough. Not your place to comment at all and you should apologise.

    • A tough journey and sensitivity is certainly needed.

    Reply

  • Reading a room is important and a baby shower is not the place to voice an unwanted opinion about the choice of name. .

    Reply

  • It’s up to the parents to name their baby, no need to voice your opinion at all.

    Reply

  • I 1000 percent t agree with the commenters who say it’s the parents decision and only theirs. I agree it would not be my choice of names and that picking your baby’s name entails a lot of considerations since your child will have their name the rest of their life. If you think of it think how you’d feel if people commented on your choice of child’s names negatively; Im sure you’d feel it’s your choice and your choice only and you’d be upset anyone should comment on your choice.

    Reply

  • It’s not your place nor your baby. MYB!

    Reply

  • Wholly what a choice of name. Not one I’d have chosen but I can also sympathise to the parents pain. That’s a had question.

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  • Probably best to apologise for upsetting her on her day. Pregnancy (especially after loss) is stressful enough without everyone’s opinion. Perhaps next time just smile and nod, just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean you have to share it.

    • Yes I agree, an apology is appropriate

      • Yes, an apology is probably appropriate

    Reply

  • Always better to keep opinions to yourself when it comes to baby names.
    I wouldn’t choose that name but up to the parents. The child can always have a name change if they don’t like it.

    Reply

  • If SIL is happy with the name they should just use it. It’s not up to anyone else but them.

    Reply

  • I wouldn’t have used that name… or for that reason… But I think if I was going to say anything, I’d have chosen a different time.

    Reply

  • It’s the parents choice, but the baby has to live with it. The name is in poor taste, imo. Explaining to people the reason behind your name is a big downer.

    Reply

  • Is it your baby? If not, it’s not your decision.

    Reply

  • People need to learn when to express their opinion and when not too. This is happening more and more lately.

    Reply

  • These days people are even more sensitive about names, etc. While you are entitled to have an opinion, it’s often best to keep it to yourself. As the child grows up, having a number for a name is probably not going to be the best thing, but at the end of the day, it’s the parents choice and names are getting weirder and weirder, so maybe it won’t be so out there…

    Reply

  • Honestly I would have kept your opinion to yourself. It’s their baby, their choice.

    Reply
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