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We have been trying to toilet train my 4 year old since in was 2.5. He is now four and still not toilet trained. We are worried because he won’t go anywhere near the toilet or potty because he is scared. We had to hold off kindy this year because of it and we are hoping that he will be toilet trained by next year. We have tried everything, reward chart, prizes, musical potty and punishment bit nothing has worked.


Posted by Supermum123, 7th March 2015


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  • Learning to use the toilet has to be a positive experience with no pressure and no punishment and plenty of small rewards. The association has to be a good one. As you seemed to have tried different strategies it may be time to consult with a health nurse or GP for some advice. Sometimes there can be some medical reasons for toileting not occurring.

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  • keep trying mama! i bet one day your child will want to use it and never look back

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  • Neither of my boys toilet trained till they were about 4.5, but then they did it virtually overnight and without rewards charts or anything. Just personality, I guess; I don’t think I did anything clever except not pressure them.

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  • Hi my son was also scared of the toilet and refused to sit on the potty. He is a very “this is my toy” sort of personality so we decided to test it. We got a teddy, put undies on the bear and sat it on the potty. He kicked the teddy off and said “no my potty” then proceeded to go in the potty. We done this everyday hourly for 2 weeks until he was trained. He is now 4 and has been fully toilet trained since he was 2. My other son wasnt toilet trained until he was around 4. The only thing that worked for him was going to wee on the yard with Dad. Doing that way took around 6 months by the time he clicked. Hope one of these works for your son :-)

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