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I found early December 2012 I was expecting baby #4. As you could imagine I was over the moon. I noticed I was really tired but my 3 other children wouldnt allow me to sleep. I was stressing a bit. January 2013 I started getting head aches just thought it was part of the pregnancy. I had a tooth extraction and was booked in for my dating scan. I was excited to see my jelly bean as i’d nick named bub but the sonographer didnt detect a heart beat. I was shocked and went back to my gp who ordered bloods and another scan. A week later my worst fear had come true. My HCG was dropping and the second scan jelly bean still didnt register a heart beat I had miscarried. We are now in April I had a d&c and have had 3 cycles since then. There is no explanation as to why I miscarried. My heart breaks every time I see either some one pregnant or they’ve had a baby. But I’ve been hiding my pain. To top this off I found out 3 weeks ago I have a hernia. I feel 2013 is not my year. But I will just keep my chin up and keep going.


Posted by sonja1980, 10th April 2013


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  • How awful! Even though bub was still a ‘jellybean’ your loss is still devastating. 2013 is over and done with now, I can only hope 2014 and 2015 have been a lot better for you

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  • That is so sad, so sorry for your loss. I know what you mean about putting on a happy face, even though you’re bawling inside :,(

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  • How brave to say you’ll keep your chin up and keep going. To lose a baby, worst pain ever. Here’s hoping you managed to do exactly what you planned and kept going and that 2014 was a better year for you xxx

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  • wow i hope that you are doing better now and your grief has eased. it is hard losing a child at any stage.

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  • I hope 2014 is being a much better year for you.

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  • oh what a bad year :(

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