Having posted an answer in the answer section, I thought i’ll share my experience here. It is not easy to be a mom, especially when you cant do anything to help your LO.

My LO became quite unwell at 1.5yo. Fear of everything became a norm when hospital became the ‘second home’. We were in and out of it almost every 2 weeks. And I know my stress has rubbed on. So I changed my reaction and made light of things. And I’m glad the hospital is very child friendly. There was one nurse who has helped tremendously when she used the puffer as a toy and did some finger play. That made my LO more at ease and when hospital become a thing of a past (fingers crossed that it will continue to be so!), LO’s ‘normal’ personality came back. But it didn’t erase my guilt that perhaps I could have done something different to avoid the months of hospitalisation.

Then one afternoon, LO woke up from a nap, had swollen face and had to be rushed to the hospital for anaphylaxis. LO had to be coaxed and cuddled to sleep. And we never did find out what had caused the reaction. again guilt raised its ugly head and i blamed myself for quite a while that perhaps I could have been more careful or done something better.

Sometimes I wish all little people (as my LO says) doesn’t have to go through these sort of experiences at such a tender age. They had to mature at a much faster pace. I guess it has its good and bad sides.

As for myself, I remind myself every now and then that I’m doing the best that I could… but there is always that other voice that says I could have done better…

Posted by jocelynwong31, 9th January 2014

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  • I went through a similar thing with my son. I know
    I did the best that I could do, and I used to think “Is there something I could
    Have done better.” It didn’t help that I had a very mentally abusive ex partner trying to
    Make life a living hell and not contribute anything positive to the situation. These days I just tend to not take ownership of others people’s issues and forge on, knowing that I’m doing the best I can.


  • I believe you did your best.
    Don’t be so hard on yourself can
    You have done an amazing job!


  • It sounds like you are doing your best so try not to feel guilt (i know that can be hard) and i hope your LO is better


  • try not to listen to the other voice hun, I am sure you have done the best you can, and will continue to do so


  • remind yourself that some things are beyond your control and it is how you deal with them that matters. hope you are bub are doing well.


  • your doing good never blame yourself for anything


  • Everyone else who gave nasty comment should keep their mouth shout! It’s easy for them to say whatever they like when they’re not the one taking care of the bub.


  • never blame yourself your doing the best you can :)


  • As mums we are always going to have that little voice- that’s how you know you are a good mum because you are worrying about your little one. It’s terrible when kids get sick for any reason or length of time. Don’t blame yourself for something that happened in the past just try your best now.

    • I like your point that it’s because your a good mum, you have that voice.


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