Every Thursday morning I roll out of bed with a feeling of impending doom… Today is the day my mother in law visits… Every. Week. All. Day. Groan…

She’s just trying to be ‘helpful’ and it’s great for my daughter to spend time with her, but I struggle to enjoy it. Selfish much?!! Every week she tells my husband she’ll be around on Thursday to ‘help me out’ – quote. I excuse you look forward to the prospect of having a few hours to clean the house properly, wipe the crayon off the walls, wash my hair and shave my legs for the first time in a week… And then she arrives… With playdough, paint or some other equally messy activity… And the fun begins. By the time she exits 6 hours later my house is a bomb site, I’ve spent the entire day making her cups of tea and lunch and have literally not sat down. Phew.

Anyone else dread their in law visits? Just me?

Posted by budmeister, 12th June 2013

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  • I think you are being a bit unfair. At least she is making an effort.


  • If you feel comfortable maybe get her to take your child to the park?


  • at least shes making an effort


  • lol, I feel your pain. I always get the ‘she’ll help you out dear” – its more frustrating then actual help


  • I actually miss mine. We had a somewhat rocky start, until I pointed out I was not a golddigger as there was not any gold to dig! We then got along very well. She passed away a few years ago now, so never got to met our little girl.


  • You poor thing. I THINK I get on with my mother in law, I say think because she lives in another country and the last time we saw her was nearly 6 years ago and that was only for a few days. I also only see my mum every 3 years she is also in the other country, but hubby gets on with her like a house on fire, I’m sure he thinks she’s his mum.


  • That doesn’t sound like she’s helping too much. Maybe you are being far too polite. Think- good- she’s coming. Make that your day to get some errands done in town, fold washing, vacuum and do other things. The house shouldn’t be perfect when she arrives. I would also make a bit of extra dinner one night and freeze it for the day she comes, then you can just heat it up and save you making something as well. Also, if a mess is being made, afterwards, you can say happily, OK, it’s clean up time now- and allocate some jobs to your daughter and MIL as you begin to tidy up. I used to be JUST like you, when my MIL was coming I would obsessively clean the house and fear her judgement as she is very judge-y. But over the years I just learned, she’s not bloody perfect either. I noticed things about her before I never did- the dust on her shelves, things looking neat on the surface but really in need of a damn good sorting out. Once in a while, maybe she could be dropped off at Granny’s house too rather than just at your house.


  • I get along really well with my mother in law, so I look forward to her coming for a visit. But if it’s getting you down why don’t you suggest that on Thursday’s you go out together somewhere and take the kids? Maybe to a park etc so you both get out of the house? Good luck! :-)


  • sorry,my mother in law is gorgeous we get on really well.


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