with my first bub i had depression. my hubby went abroad when i was 2 months pregnant with my first bub. it was a tense time for me. i knew i had to do everything alone…almost. because i was living with his extended family but i had just left my family, so it was just as hard for me. the list of people i missed the most was long. and my mum was on top of it. the feeling of becoming a mum and experiencing so many changes in my body was not easy for me and reminded me of her all the time. i also missed my father a lot, who was also abroad, than my brother. who was like a friend to me. and my sister who was also 8 months pragnent with her first too. and than i was missing my hubby. it was so challenging for me to pull myself together. but it became harder when i found myself without much support from hubby. still it went quite ok, but only before the birth. than after birth i started having feelings to end it all. it sounds scary, i know but where i was there was no awareness about PND. didn’t even heard the term until i came here in Australia. off couse if it was not considered a disease, so there was no treatment. i don’t know how i was saved. may be it was my defenses or my baby. but today, i still sit here and think how bad it could be. especially without any support. i am so thank full to be able to hold my children and see them giggle. yes there are tears sometimes, but mostly its smiles and life couldn’t be better. i just want to let every mum out there know not to let go. when there is life, there is hope. Don’t even think of waiting you life. its so amazing and we might not have it again. we are all doing such a good job. give your self some time. yes it takes time but every thing turns fine at the end.
Posted anonymously, 20th May 2014