After a year of trying and a miscarriage we were finally blessed with baby number 2.At 12 weeks they found a blood clot near baby ( can’t remember the actual name of it) and all we could do was wait it out,if the clot burst we would of lost bub.We managed to get through that rough patch and then we made it to 20 weeks we’re they found my platelets were dropping and fast so that required fortnightly hospital check ups and weekly bloodtest across town at the local hospital, at 28 weeks they found bub had seriously dropped in the womb,it was a guessing game on when he’d arrive and at 32 weeks i went into labour , Alexander arrived weighing 4 pounds and on my birthday. That following month was one of the hardest things i had ever been through I’d cry every day and I had so much guilt,i thought it was my fault.He was stuck in his little incubator with tubes everywhere, everytime the mointor beeped I’d freak out. It was challenging getting up every two hours to pump and then leave for the hospital at 6 hang around until 1 and then head home make food,spend time with my daughter and husband and then go back to the hospital for a few hours,just to have to say good bye and leave him behind,we did this every day for a month. When bub was realeased from hospital i thought finally we can be normal,post natal depression hit hard, i would curl up in the fetal position and cry every day. 3 months later my daughter started prep,i think things became more difficult then with having a set routine so we could get my daughter to school on time,that winter was horrible we ended up in hosptial 5 different times with croup and viral infections . Alex is a few weeks away from turning two he’s hypo and non stop he’s active,healthy and just perfect. I look back and wonder how did we do it, because honestly I’ve got no idea. I’m at a happy and content point now that everything has settled into place.

Posted anonymously, 5th July 2017

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