I got pregnant when I was 19, I was living with my daughters father and friends, things were rocky to say the least, he always went out clubbing, treated me like his piggy bank and sponged off my earnings. we moved into a place together, and 3 weeks into the 6 month lease he dumped me over text.
I then found out he had been cheating on me, I tried to forgive him, make things work sort out our issues, but he had started a relationship with this new girl. he was emotionally abusive and threatening. I was lucky to have a full time job untill 36 weeks, so after he moved out to live with his new gf i could scrape the rent through. I couldnt afford to eat, all my money went to rent and preparing for the baby.
I have struggled severe depression all my life, been in and out of perth clinic and on all sorts of anti depressants and anxiety medication, as a pregnant alone alone and vulnerable teenager my ex took advantage of me. He cheated on his new gf with me, he refused to give back my keys and would rock up whenever he wanted.
I had to stay strong. I had to be ok for my little girl. I fough the depression, the anxiety, the meltdowns and all i though of, was my beautiful little girl in my arms. that when she is there it would all be worth it, the pain, the heartache everything will be ok.
2 weeks before i was due, I asked my ex to stay at the house, incase i went into labour and couldnt drive to the hospital. he said he wouldnt stay. It was a wednesday, I decided that day, in a moment of clarity, that I was never going get any help o support from him, that it was ok to be on my own and it will be ok. That friday I stayed at my parents house on a whim, and had my girl on the saturday.
I didnt let him in the delivery room, he bashed on the door but i didnt let him in. My mum was holding my hand the whole way, she was my rock, and to this day she is an incredible woman for helping me as she does.
for the first 3 months I lived on my own, and It was good. I couldnt afford to eat very often, I didnt go out much, I just stared into my beautiful little girls eyes and it was ok
Posted by taylorjane92, 15th March 2013