This is for all the step parents, foster parents, adopted parents, and anyone caring for a child that is not biologically their own.
I always hear women talk about the miracle of childbirth, the pain and how wonderful it is to meet the little person that has been growing inside them.
I’m sure it must be amazing, but I have never experienced it.
Just because someone has given birth to a child or had their DNA in the making of the child, does this make them a parent? And because I haven’t had the privilege, does this mean I am not a parent?
I met my little girl when she was 3 years old, not too long later her mother abandoned her for drugs.
Yes, quite tragic but this little one was amazing and I helped to look after her for periods at a time. She loved to be cuddled, she loved to sing and she loved to play any game that one could make up.
I found myself falling in love with her, and it wasn’t long before I wished I could spend every moment with her.
Although for reasons I won’t mention, this was not possible, but my husband and I included her in everything from our wedding to our holidays, as much as possible.
She really did become our little girl. She loved spending time with us just as much as we loved spending time with her.
When we would pick her up, she’d be waiting by the window watching out, and when we’d drop her off there would be tears. We had them too but didn’t let them go until we’d driven away.
There have been times we’ve had to take her to and from school, help her with homework, clean up vomit and changed the sheets.
What do you think? Am I a parent?
DNA is a genetic code that decides the colour of your eyes and the size of your nose. If you share your DNA with a child, it does not automatically make you a parent. You probably have a greater chance of being a parent but like any of us, with the responsibility of a child thrust upon us, we become parents.
When the needs of a child become more important than ‘what are we doing this weekend’, and loving them is your whole world, you have become a parent.
I have never been pregnant, I have never given birth or shared my DNA with another, but I AM A PARENT.