sometimes i feel like i am carrying the world on my shoulders. My husband doesn’t work and money just doesn;t stretch very far. Although hubby is home of a day while i work, home duties and caring for the kids seems never ending. i wish i could give the kids the world but i cant. I hate that so many times i cant give the kids what they want. Yes our clothes are second hand but our bills are paid aand we do have a roof over our head. I get so depressed when i explain to my son that we just cant afford the new xbox game he wants or tell my girl she cant have that $60 dollar Barbie. I always fear that when my kids grow up all they will remember is what they couldnt have in life instead of how much i love them.

Posted by mrs harkness, 21st February 2013

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  • You are not a bad mum! And your kids will remember the love and the time you gave them, not the things. Keep doing what you’re doing, you’re doing a great job


  • Thank you for sharing. I really liked reading it!


  • As long as your kids have your time and your love, they’ll never go without. They might feel like that now, but when they look back, they’ll know how good they had it. Have you considered lay by for those little surprises for the kids? It’s a handy way to get what they want and be able to pay it off in affordable increments fir you. Keep going, I’m sure you’re doing a great job. Stop being so tough on yourself


  • Kids don’t need Stuff they need love and security… sounds like they have that


  • From a kid who grew up in a poor family trust me its not the things you brought them that they will remember its how you treated them and talked to them they will remeber and the times you spent time with them.

    • I wholeheartedly agree and speak from experience too. Children need time and love and material possession fade away. Look at cheaper alternatives for toys and also look at toy libraries in your local area.


  • Kids will remember more how you made them feel rather than what you gave them


  • Kids don’t remember the material things, it’s the time spent with them and the way you make them feel that they’ll remember.


  • Don’t you dare feel bad!! Are your kids been fed? Do they have a roof over their heads? Do they have a warm bed to sleep on at night? Are they attending school? If you’ve answered yes to all of them then you are much richer than you thought. Your kids will understand when they get older I find that layby helps you can probably layby the Xbox and barbie for Christmas


  • Your not a bad mum. I associate between needs and wants, material things and love. Giving the children a roof over their heads, providing food , clothing and medical comes first. Think of where this statements are coming from. Did you have everything when you were a child, is someone telling you this? If someone is telling you this separate whats your problem and their problem. Your kids will love you unconditional just like you do. My hubby stays home swapping roles, i get second hand clothes. These days new clothes dont last long. Our kids can afford to get dirty in them and be outside more. If its the latest games movies etc then it may be cheaper waiting for it to come down. We do laybys, flybuys, and reward savers. I get samples before i buy. I can cook something out of nothing. Playing board games, going camping, outings etc is greater quality time.

    • I have to agree with you. You use your commonsense and it you don’t have the money to pay for it you wait until you do. Op. shop clothes are often near new at a % of the retail price in dept. stores or discount stores. You may even find that they have the original retail store price tag on them. You may even manage to get 3 complete outfits for what you would pay for one at a retail store. I know a family who accomplished that. ou may be able to pick up reasonable quality toys at an Op.shop too. Another option is to borrow toys from a Council Library. I don’t know how long you are allowed to borrow them for and what financial arangement applies if there is any.


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