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Why is it that when a family member dies that people come out of the woodwork wanting their share. I find it very insensitive when we’re all still grieving. It’s not easy being an executor and trustee of a will. There is due process, and bills to be paid and it takes ages to wind up an estate. Can I at least get the headstone put up before people out their hands out. It seems that people expect to receive an inheritance. I’m tempted to travel and spend my money, and leave very little to others. Perhaps I’ll leave a lump sum to charity, and if that’s the case, which one. If there is no money left in the estate, there can be no bickering.


Posted anonymously, 26th April 2015


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  • You sound like an executor who is trying to do the right thing. In my case, it’s the executor not doing anything they should be doing. It’s been 10 years since my mum passed and we’re still waiting for the estate to be settled. Everyone says we should have the executors replaced, but that’s so expensive. It’s not fair that the executor sits back and does nothing. They’ve rented the house out (estate is house and land package that is to be sold) she don’t supply accounts of let me know anything that’s going on. :,(

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  • My parents unwittingly told my siblings their plans for their estate…all hell broke lose!

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  • I intend to spend 90% of my kids inheritance.

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  • Unfortunately this is a time when some people show a side of themselves that can be quite ‘ugly’. It is sad when this occurs and unfortunately it occurs quite often-people wanting money and possessions and having spent very little, if any time with the person when they were alive. Quite shameful! Wishing you well. :)

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  • Yes, it isn’t pleasant. My mother-in-law passed away over a year ago, but the estate has only just been settled. We found out that within a fortnight of her passing, my brother-in-law put in a claim on her estate. A very small estate it was and most of it went in lawyers’ fees.

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  • I’m so sorry you had to go through this. It’s terrible.
    I know of a few people who went through the same thing. I’m sorry for your loss

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